Building Bonds in Virginia

Maliana ~

I feel so far behind and a little bit beaten up after the past week and a half in dealing with, well, life. Aside from the uber bright spot of finally getting to meet and spend time with some friends in Virginia, it’s been an extremely challenging time. As you and I seemed to be getting sicker and sicker (with a nasty virus and draining cases of bronchitis), the house remodel seemed to be getting more and more chaotic, and the departure date for our long-awaited vacation loomed closer and closer. It seemed that if anything could go wrong for us last week, it did. I just wanted to, and did, curl up in a ball numerous times and wish for some type of relief. Fortunately, with some good antibiotics, rest (when we could get it), and a little bit of luck, you and I got well enough to join Daddy on our adventure to Virginia. Thank goodness!

Backing up a bit though, I do have to make an honorable mention of your amazing empathy as you began to feel better and the brunt of that illness hit me. As I sunk deeper into feeling like a Mack truck had run me over, you noticed and said, “Poor Mommy”, then took it upon yourself to tell me to lie down next to you and tickled my back as we watched TV one day while home from work and school. I couldn’t believe it. It was the sweetest little gesture. You were so empathic. Sometimes I wonder if you really are four, or are actually an older person trapped in a kid’s body. But then you put my quandaries to rest on day three of my illness by saying, “Don’t cough on my picture!” when I was having a coughing fit as you colored next to me. I guess three days is your limit for feeling sorry for dear old Mom.

By the end of day three though, after being holed up with you in our bedroom to stay out of the way of the construction work, I found myself even feeling thankful for being sick with you. After raiding the pharmacy in the morning, gathering a fresh stockpile of snacks and activities, painting our nails, taking a nap together, and watching show after show on PBS, I realized (all over again) what an awesome kid you are. You never complained once about being cooped up with me, and we just made the best of it. I may not wish for either of us to be sick very often, but the silver lining in it all is that you and I got to spend a whole day together full of undistracted bonding time. I can honestly say that there aren’t many other people I’d rather be sick with than you, monkey.

I was also relieved to see you begin to goof around again, catching you conversing with yourself in the mirror at one point, (e.g. “Hi! You’re Maliana? …I’m Maliana!”). Ha ha. You were obviously feeling better.

By Thursday, we made an emergency detour to your doctor for some meds to take on our trip, just to be sure that we had kicked this illness’s butt. We hit a few snags in actually getting the prescriptions filled, but by the time we finally hit the freeway, your enthusiasm was contagious as you looked from Daddy to me and said while clapping, “This is gonna be exciting!” You did great on the road trip, aside from being very concerned that we had taken a wrong turn and were actually in the Smokey Mountains again. You are so perceptive!

We collapsed into bed in Luray, VA and woke up on Friday to hit the Luray Caverns. Our first of many fun times this weekend.

Dream Lake inside the caverns...only 18" of water but looked endlessly deep

keeping track of slow poke Daddy, making sure he was keeping up
with the group

feeling brave

Back in the car and we were finally heading toward our destination, the home of some friends whom (thanks to the magic of Facebook and blogging), we have become closer to over the last couple of years despite never having actually met in person. You see, probably about 2 years ago a mutual friend had linked Stacy and I together because Stacy and her family were about to bring their daughter, Cadence, home from China. Cadence was also born with a cleft lip and palate and so our mutual friend (Corie) gave Stacy our information so we could chat about what to possibly expect in their journey. Little did we know all that would come of that simple introduction. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again…I am so thankful for the blessings that adoption has brought into our lives which have included not only you, but a wealth of wonderful people and friendships throughout the adoption community. The Williams family is no exception.

Shortly after arriving, you were off and giggling with Stacy and Brad's three girls, Sierra, Laurel, and Cadence. By bedtime that first night you had helped feed their chickens; gone on several “road trips” down the driveway; had a water balloon fight against Daddy; donned a baggy bottomed bathing suit (and eventually your birthday suit) while getting thoroughly soaked from a water table; then ran around and around and around their house screaming and chasing each other until you were all thoroughly exhausted.

feeding the chickens was way cool

collecting eggs for her mama

thumbs up, ready to roll!

the classic "hand over the backseat, driving in
reverse" maneuver

oops! a little off-roading?

first of many girlfriend road trips

all piled in!

Sierra is done with the water balloons and decides to go after Daddy
with the water bottle...he looks scared, don't you think?

the water table...simple but oh so fun

uh oh, the goggles are on...this is getting serious!

silly soaked girls

I think you have another decade or so before those puppies come in honey

goofs

The second day we headed to a wine festival set in some beautiful rolling green fields, which is basically most of Virginia. What a pretty area of the country! After face painting and train rides for the kids and many sips of wine for the adults, we headed towards home. But not before the girls’ grandparents met us for some ice cream first.

Sierra playing ball with you

excited!

Cadence is checking the safety rating of this barrel train
with its conductor

sitting still while Cadence looks on

the reveal

my little leopard

I have to give a shout out to Sierra here...she originally had willingly sacrificed her own
face painting money so that her little sister could get exactly what she wanted on her face...
what a selfless act, a reflection of a thoughtful kid, and evidence of some amazing parenting! 

green fields, good wine, and great friends

you and Cadence's expressions crack me up!
of course, who wouldn't feel that silly after filling up on ice cream?

one of the many scenes this weekend of Laurel sweetly
attending to you

and another scene of Sierra being so sweet and patient
with your silly antics

By Sunday, it was time for us to head to Great Wolf Lodge for the finale of the weekend. After breakfast we were all hustling to get ready. If there were a couple of moments when I could tell you weren’t quite sure where you fit into the hubbub of a big family, these moments were more than made up for by a majority of other moments where you were just one of the crew. You generally jumped right in to the mix, and only had a couple meltdowns over the course of the weekend. You got along very well with all three girls, with Laurel especially taking you under her wing and making sure you had plenty of hugs and attention. And not only did all of you girls blend so well together, but I watched as you spontaneously grabbed and hugged Stacy just before hitting the road that morning too. It made me smile to see your completely unsolicited “stamp of approval”. I already knew that I thought very highly of this entire family, but kids have an even better intuition than most adults. I’m glad to see that my instincts were right.

oh my goodness did it take a while to get this picture of us all...
I wonder if it had something to do with an extremely ornery 4 year old??

After 3 hours in the car, we finally made it to the lodge. You were so excited and squealing like mad as we marched into that water park. You could hardly contain yourself and weren’t sure where to go or what to do first. I love seeing that kind of exhilaration in you! You did much better than I expected in the water and even tried a couple big slides with a little encouragement (e.g. Daddy climbing with you to the top and then peeling your fingers off the rim of the slide and giving you a little push to send you careening down to where I scooped you up, sputtering, out of the water). You vetoed any more slides after a couple of those, but hey, at least you tried it.

After all of that splashing and swimming, we were all starving so we headed off to a local BBQ joint. All I can say from that crazy, running around and climbing under the table dinner is, yes, we were THAT family in the restaurant. You girls sure did have fun though so who cares, right?

Once back at the hotel you, Sierra, Laurel, and Cadence played some kind of magic quest game the hotel promotes for all the kids. Basically, you buy these exorbitantly priced plastic “magic” wands that you can point at various props in the hotel to make said props light up, open, or talk. Of course, it’s a little more detailed of a concept than that, but whoever came up with the idea is pure genius. What a money maker! You girls really got into it though so, when in Rome, right? Here’s my credit card, be gentle. At least you didn’t insist on getting the costumes and other accessories too.

putting your wands to good use in a sword fight

"turning the lamp on" with your
overpriced piece of plastic "magic" wand

abra cadabra!

the only picture I could get of the water park...I was too afraid of ruining
my camera to get any closer with it

We wrapped up our last night together with you and Cadence listening to story time in the lobby while Sierra and Laurel got a bit more swimming in before bed. As we sat in the room chatting later, we talked briefly about how strange this situation might seem. Here we are two families that had never met each other before but who decided to jump right in to spend a weekend together. Yeah, looking at it on the surface, it could seem a little crazy, but sometimes those ideas work out the best. In spite of being sick all week prior to, and then even into the beginning of our trip, I am really glad we came. Even Laurel was feeling it too when she turned around as she was going to bed and said, “I’m really glad you all came this weekend.” Wow! How sweet is that?

story time with the moms

we originally thought that letting you girls try Pop Rocks would freak you out...
little did we know Cadence would LOVE them!

eventually you tried and liked the Pop Rocks too...
but your first reaction to Cadence chowing down on them was
something like, "Girl, you crazy!"

yeah baby...let's get this party started!
preschoolers gone wild!

So on a leap of faith, we finally got to meet and get to know some really great people that I had only really known on-line; people who were generous enough to open their home to us without batting an eye; people who we found to be so friendly and easy to talk to; people with whom we share the experience of adoption and parenting and all that goes with it; and people who are clearly doing a great job raising their kids. The weekend went so fast, I just wish we could have spent more time together.

We said our goodbyes early on Monday morning then hit the road for our 9 hour car trip home! Remarkably, you did not complain once and were in good spirits the entire time. While this week may have started rocky, it definitely ended on a high note. All’s well that ends well, but hopefully this is no ending but rather just the beginning of a long friendship for our two families in the years ahead. Good friends are hard to find, and so I am forever grateful that we've found these five.

Love,

Mama