Ups and downs and everything in between, with a brilliant offbeat ending!

Maliana ~

What an amazing end to a very interesting week with you. This has been a week of more assertions of your independence, a lot of developing imagination, and a little sassy attitude thrown in for fun!

Monday was a holiday off work for me, Martin Luther King Jr Day...so I stayed home with you. Daddy stayed home too, but unfortunately he was sick so we pretty much just stayed inside, playing in the warmth of the house. You may have been getting a little stir crazy inside though, as you were pretty defiant at various moments. You have been vacillating between yelling, "I do it!" at me, or purposely getting in situations where you ask for my help (when you don't necessarily need it) and yelling "No, you do it!" when I encourage you to help yourself. Maybe you are struggling a little bit with your burgeoning sense of independence, or maybe you're just a little "drunk with power", but either way, it's driving me a little crazy. However, I know it's something that is really important to your sense of autonomy, so I guess I'll bite my lip and resign myself to the fact that most things will take 3 times as long as they used to for a while, then just sit back and enjoy watching you figure the world out for yourself, one task at a time. Just before you went to bed, we did make some cute picture frames for the fridge which you seemed to enjoy. We do still have to pick out just the right photos for them. A good project for next week, right?

Unfortunately, your defiance and sass did carry over into your school life too this week. On Tuesday when I picked you up from school, Ms Brandi told me that you were pouty, stomping your feet and crossing your arms, butting your way in line, and even took some toys from your friends at school at one point. It was so out of the ordinary from your usual behavior, Ms Brandi wanted to bring it to our attention since she knows we'd want to address it with you. Well, both Daddy and I did have a talk with you about it, and reminded you about appropriate behavior at school, with your friends and teachers. I even texted Daddy the next morning, reminding him to remind you of what we talked about. Well, I am happy to report that when I picked you up on Wednesday, Ms Brandi had a glowing report, saying that you were back to the "old Mali". I am so proud of you. I have no idea what got into you on Tuesday, but I am impressed that you can listen so well, take to heart our conversations, and put it to practice at school so quickly. You are one amazing little person. Anyway, since there was such good news at school, I took you out for ice cream at McDonald's and you were one happy camper, singing and being silly. On the way home, we were jamming in the car and you discovered a new song that you like, Mambo #5. This was a big song many years ago, probably when I was in college at some point, so it was pretty funny to hear you singing along.

Once we got home on Wednesday, I showed you the work I'd done on your future playroom. I was able to get home early from work, get a bunch of stuff cleaned out of the spare bedroom and set some of your toys up in it before I had to pick you up. You were thrilled and said, "Thank you for playroom Mommy!" while giving me a ginormous hug. I can't wait until Daddy and I can finish it up for you! After playing for a bit with your dress-up clothes (mostly as Dr Mali aka Dr Q T Patootie), you and I finished cleaning out our linen closet and went through a ton of my old make-up samples. We had a ball at Makeup Fest 2011! It was so much fun to go through the makeup, piece by piece, you with one box and me with another, sorting through and divvying it all up, taking whatever each of us liked. Daddy came home and found us, saying, "You guys are so cute", and then he commented that you looked like the Joker from Batman, (I guess we need to work on your application of the makeup, hee hee). I felt like I was hanging out with a teenager...I even texted Lao Lao a picture, to which she replied, "How old is she?!?" I remember loving to get into my mom's Avon samples when I was a kid, and it turns out you are just like me! You were so proud of your new loot, that you kept trying to carry your big box of makeup around the house the rest of the night, exclaiming, "I carried it, I'm a big girl!"

checking my chart

hold still, this won't hurt a bit

evidently my ear needed some meds

 

Dr's coat says "Dr Q T Patootie"



picking out some lip gloss at Makeup Fest 2011


after applying lip gloss, yikes!

Also, speaking of you being thankful, I made my famous cheddar meatloaf this week, to which you replied, "Thank you for meatloaf Mommy!" when I told you what was for dinner. Wow ~ only you kiddo. You are the only nearly 3 year old that thanks their parent for meatloaf that I know of! And, another little detail from this week is your insistence on changing into a white t-shirt, jeans, and boots after school. You are my little "James Dean". I took a picture of you in this outfit, as you typed a letter on my new laptop ~ if you were any taller than your current 34 inches, I'd swear you were a teenager!

"James Dean", on my laptop...you are almost 3, going on 13!

So, as I mentioned earlier, your imagination has really been emerging, growing and changing by leaps and bounds, and it is SO much fun! This week, you have been giving your baby Dudley tons of baths, riding your motorcycle to Hawaii (with me and both of your suitcases on the back), dragging your silkie around the house and calling it your suitcase, playing doctor (completely dressed in scrubs and surgical hat - as pictured above - and telling me "It's ok, don't cry, you're a big girl, good girl"), talking to President Obama and President Hu Jintau on the phone (after listening to Daddy and I talk about Hu Jintau's visit to DC, we handed you your toy phone and you said, "Hi Obama! Hi China!"), and picking me up from school on the back of your motorcycle and stopping to get ice cream on the way home. You also are at the age where when you close your eyes, you think that you are invisible. Every day you come up with something new, and I can't wait to see what kind of game you come up with next. I love this age!

I tell you what though...the grand finale has got to be this weekend, being a rival for one of the best weekends (especially Sunday) on record so far. It starts on Friday, as Daddy told me a little detail about you that makes his mornings with you much easier. When he gets up to take a shower, you now go in and hang out in the bathroom with him, eating your yogurt until he is done. You also strip off your jammies and sit on your little stool, directly over the vent, warming your little tushie until he is out of the shower and can get you dressed. Daddy says it's awesome because you are getting so cooperative and helpful now. Mornings sure are a lot smoother than they used to be!

On Saturday, you were so sweet. You and I slept so soundly, with you cuddled into the crook of my arm and neck all night. It was one of the best night's sleeps I've had in a long time. As soon as we opened our eyes, you looked at me and asked, "Mommy, want to play in my room?" I loved this because you have just recently been claiming your room as your own, really embracing spending time there and playing with all of your toys on your own. It's wonderful. One of the games we played included singing to soothe your baby as we laid in bed with her. We both took turns singing all of the songs that I normally sing to you. I loved singing these duets with you for your little baby. Another one of those magical moments I'd like to save forever. Then, we decided to paint your baby's toes & fingernails. I let you do it on your own, and things got a little messy, but you loved it.

Mali's Nail Salon

Saturday afternoon, Lao Lao came over and played for a bit. You both were so silly and laughing hysterically together. You were so squiggly and nutty, nearly impossible to get dressed and when I asked Lao Lao if all kids are like this, she replied, "No...she's just really happy" ~ that made me feel good. I hope she's right.

playing Mali's very strange "lick game"

We headed off to Kidzapalooza at the fairgrounds after a while and it was a good time. You were like night and day from last year to this year. I wish we would have gotten down there earlier, but we had a blast with the time we did have. I was so proud of you for one thing in particular. You had fun in a few different bounce houses, even doing an American Heart Association obstacle course! However there was a HUGE inflatable slide where you had to climb a tall ladder and then slide down a really long slide. You weren't so sure about it, and kept saying "Not yet" when we'd ask if you wanted to do it. Well, before we left, you decided you finally wanted to try it. I didn't really appreciate how big it was until I saw you trudging your way up that ladder. You looked so tiny! But, you made it to the top and came down the slide, all by yourself! I couldn't believe it and I was so proud of you. I told you how brave you were, and explained that being brave isn't about not being scared, but rather going ahead and trying something new in spite of being a little scared or nervous. You've definitely got more guts than I ever had at your age kiddo!

beginning the ascent

using the handrails like we watched all the other kids do, climbing like a champ

at the summit

and down she comes!

so proud of her accomplishment!

On the way home, we picked up Lao Lao's friend Sal, telling you we were "picking Sal up". Well, evidently, it sounded different to you because when Lao Lao got out of the car to get Sal, you asked "Where's Salad?" Ha ha! I guess "Sal up" could sound like "salad" to an almost 3 year old! Once home, you and I set up your train tracks, all your idea. I was so happy to see you playing with these, since this was one of your gifts from Santa this year and I wasn't quite sure you liked it. It was fun and you really got into building the tracks with me. Spending time with you is always so neat and full of surprises.

This morning, you had me cracking up from the get-go. Upon waking, you and I headed into the kitchen and when you saw Daddy's leftover pizza in the fridge, you exclaimed, "I didn't know there was pizza here!" To which I promptly responded by sitting you down with some cold pizza and Gatorade (your choice) for breakfast. Yep! You're so ready for college!

Once Daddy got up, we headed to a local joint, Gena's Cafe. It is a really good local spot, with some serious down-home cooking. Yum! We got you a single pancake, not realizing that each pancake weighs one pound! You were hysterical with this enormous thing! You were so adorable throughout the whole meal too, chatting and laughing away. You made yourself very helpful, wanting to stir Daddy and I's coffee whenever we'd get a warm-up. You made a friend in another little girl that came in, giving her knuckles when she left. And, then also very loudly yelling, "Who's that?" whenever someone new would walk in. Thankfully, this was a very warm, friendly, and casual place that was full of customers who were down to Earth and could appreciate your brand of hilarity. You even provided an impromptu performance of dancing to Daddy's ring-tone music. That's our silly girl! I definitely think we've found a new spot for our weekend family breakfasts.

good grief that pancake was huge!!

On the way home, you asked where the moon went when the sun came out. Daddy had a good answer, working a little of China in there. He said that when the sun came out here, the moon was up in China. Then I added that yes, when we can see the sun,  the mommy in China (who grew you in her belly) sees the moon, and vice versa. I try every now and then to begin introducing your birth mother into discussions, especially now that you are starting to understand pregnancy, and a whole heap of other concepts. So far, you typically get a bit quiet, perhaps trying to process it all, when I mention things like this. I look forward to when you can piece it together enough to ask some more questions back, particularly about your birth parents. But until then, we'll just keep cracking that door open for you for when you're ready.

After nap, we took our first family bowling trip. It was so much fun! We went ahead and did a real game on the big lanes, and you had your own little 6 pound (the smallest they had) bright green ball. You really wanted to do it yourself, however I was paranoid about you dropping the ball on your toes (since it was 25% of your body weight!) so we helped you a little. You did really good! It was neat to see you trying something new and loving it. We actually shared the other lane with a woman and her 3 boys, two of which were adopted from China, with cleft lips and palates just like you! It was neat to see a family like ours and they were really nice. They had some loud music with big video screens at the end of the alleys, and you of course had to boogy, hilariously, in true Mali fashion. Then before leaving, you and Daddy went to the bathroom, and as you both came out, you stopped and did a terrific air guitar, with scrunched face and all. I laughed out loud for a while at that one.

smallest ball they had was still HUGE for you!

watching the slow revolutions...all the way down the lane

you did great and had a ball ~ literally!

not too shabby Mali!

We had to stop at Target on the way home, and Daddy and I joked that you were like the goofy kid from that movie Parenthood. The one that walks around with a bucket on his head, ramming himself into walls, (Steve Martin's character's son). We said this because for some reason, you felt the need to crouch down in the middle of the main aisle, and...be a kitty cat. Meowing and crawling all over. We figured you weren't hurting anything, so we just kept on shopping, (and giggling to ourselves). You keep us entertained for sure. Before leaving, we stopped for coffee (we called yours "chocolate coffee") at Starbucks and you had us in stitches again, singing, dancing, and trying to wink like Daddy. Once home, you helped Daddy take some bags of bedding down the hallway to put in the attic. You are much stronger than you look, carrying two at a time! You are a beast!

After much more giggling, wrestling, dancing, and playing in general, you are finally in bed. Sleeping soundly and getting lots of rest so that we can, hopefully, carry all of this fun into the next week. I tell you, you have a really great sense of humor, much older in my opinion than any other 2-3 year old that I know. Each day I don't think it can get any better, but somehow it does. The privilege, and wonder, of being a parent I guess.

Love,
Mama

Questions, questions, and more questions...

Maliana ~

Oh. My. Gosh. You are firmly planted in the age of "What's that?" How's it work?" "Who's that?" "How you do that?" and so forth...thus, explaining the title of this post. I now know why people would say, "Be careful what you wish for" when I'd lament that I couldn't wait until you could speak. It is wonderful to hear you ask so many questions and be so curious about the world around you...but, WOW!! You have so many questions!!! Many days I just try to keep up with answering all of them somewhat intelligently.

So, this past week was a good one. I have to catch up a bit with a little tidbit from last Sunday night (after I had already updated your blog). You were entertaining Daddy and I, dancing and singing to the Black Eyed Peas, "I Gotta Feeling". Your booty shaking is unparalleled! Then, when Daddy put you to bed, you gave me one of the biggest hugs and kisses that you've doled out in a long time. I loved it!

dancing around with one of our leftover New Year's Eve hats

more fun with the hat

Unfortunately, you woke up on Sunday night/Monday morning at 2am, needing medicine for an earache. We all got up and got it for you, then you snuggled back onto my chest and went back to sleep. It was just another one of those moments that I appreciate as a Mom. Being able to comfort you when you hurt, help you feel better enough to go back to a sound sleep, makes me remember my own mom, Lao Lao, doing the same thing for me...that old "Mom Magic" is what I call it.

We met Daddy, Memaw, and Papaw at Bob Evans for dinner on Monday night. On the way home, the song by Bruno Mars, "Just The Way You Are" came on the radio and I told you that it reminded me of you and asked you to listen to the lyrics.  I sang it to you, which you got a kick out of, and then you in turn began acting out the lyrics...like, smiling really big and pointing to your mouth when it says, "When you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while". It was really cute. When the song ended, you said, "More Mommy". I'm glad you like it. I'm planning on using it in your video slide show of this past year for our Gotcha/Family Day celebration. When we got home, I put it on your MP3 player you got for Christmas. You have got some really good taste in music kiddo.

On Tuesday, Audrey Ayi came over and we played in the snow, sledding down our crazy steep backyard. We only sent you down a few times, and then you were content to just shovel the snow around on the deck. But, not before throwing yourself face down in a huge snowbank...between you and the dog, you both can't get enough snow in your snouts! After coming inside, you and Audrey played while I made dinner. You informed Audrey that both you and she had babies in your bellies. I am guessing this is due to the lesson that you learned last weekend about babies growing inside bellies after seeing Michelle, Mia's mom, who is about halfway done with her pregnancy. It threw Audrey for a loop, but I was happy to see you using your imagination and showing that you had once again been paying attention to what we were explaining to you. That night, you also put your jammies on nearly all by yourself. You are getting so self-sufficient. It's awesome to watch!

playing in the snow with Audrey Ayi

got the pants on...figuring out your jammie top

finishing the last button...look at that concentration!

On Thursday, I had already packed all of our sledding gear before I went to work, so we headed to the sledding hill at Blendon Woods Park right after school. You were pretty tired, so we only went down the hill one time. But, what you really enjoyed was checking out the nature center. You liked handling all of the animal skulls they had found in the forest, and were enamored by the pet box turtle they had. His name was Don Juan-sta...and when I asked where that name came from, the naturalist said it's because he's a boy turtle and whenever they put a girl in the cage with him...he always "wantsta". Horny little thing.

finding out what an animal skull feels like

waiting for Don the turtle to move

After we left the park, we went to Friendly's and got some dinner. You perked up a bit at dinner, and were very engaging with our server. She commented on how smart and chatty you were, then asked how old you were...to which you piped in, "I'm 3, my birthday March 6" and then you attempted to hold up 3 fingers again. I never appreciated how much coordination that takes...but you are getting it, slowly but surely. As we left Friendly's, you heard some music outside and couldn't help but boogie just a bit. At bedtime, I sang "Lullaby" by the Dixie Chicks to you and you were spellbound, saying "More Mama" at the end, and laughing right on cue at the lyric that goes, "and your laugh is like a serenade". You are too precious. I've always enjoyed singing, but have been horribly self-conscious when singing in front of others. Thanks to you, at least for the time being, I have an appreciative audience and an outlet for what I enjoy. Thank you Mali.

On Friday, I got to school to pick you up early. You were still sitting down for snack with your friends, so I decided to sit down with you and got to know all of your friends' names. As I talked to Ms. Brandi, she had an interesting story about you and "smoking a hot dog". Apparently, you will sit back at playtime, prop your feet up, and put a large brown wooden toy hot dog (although it looks more like a bratwurst) in your mouth, and pretend to smoke it. You are pretty convincing too. I asked, where did you see that (since neither Daddy or I smoke) and you said, "Daddy...cigar." Ahh, makes sense now. Except that you have only seen Daddy smoke a cigar about 2 times, and the last time was about 6 months ago! Man, you don't miss a beat or forget a thing! I guess Ms. Brandi and Ms. Adrienne were pretty amused and wondered about this for a while. Thankfully, the mystery has been solved at where you learned that.

Saturday morning was the best wake up I've had in a long time, Eskimo (or nosey) kisses from the one and only Mali! You went off to breakfast and shopping with Memaw and Papaw and Daddy, where they bought you some 'twinkle toes' shoes, little sneakers that light up on, you guessed it, the toes. You love them! Refusing to take them off all day. Lao Lao and I went for a long walk in the snow with Abby while you were off shopping, and then when we got back it was your nap time. You made Lao Lao read you a book, 3 times in a row, stalling as usual, and of course enjoying your time with Lao Lao. After nap, I gave you a bath and you insisted on bringing your baby with you. You are getting really good at mothering her, washing her in the tub about as well as I wash you. Then of course, you also insisted on diapering your baby, which I had to quickly fashion out of a paper towel and scotch tape. Not too shabby.



munching on a 7-layer burrito, which you have decided that you love, just like Lao Lao



so proud of bathing and wrapping your baby

This morning, you have been trying to be so helpful. But, at almost 3 years old, what is "helpful", can also be a bit frustrating too. I am sorry that I got a little flustered with you, when you kept insisting (and not taking no for an answer) on helping me with the microwave at breakfast. You try so hard to be right there in the mix with us all, I easily forget that you are simply trying to be of assistance, instead of just being "under foot". Sometimes I have to take a step back, take a deep breath, and get perspective again...which is what happened this morning. I'll keep working on this, ok honey?
 
Anyway, nap time today brought a dry diaper. As soon as you got up, you came out to get me and then proceeded to do your 'pee pee dance' and ask me to help you turn on the light in the bathroom so you could go. While I know that this is no big feat for you at school (you are routinely dry there). At home, we aren't as regimented with a schedule. So, when you are dry after nap here, it really shows your progress! Yay Mali!
 
Tonight we went to a Thai restaurant to celebrate Uncle Flint's birthday. Earlier today, you came in and asked, "Mom, are you ready?" and when I asked for what, you said, "The birthday!" You have been pretty excited about celebrating this birthday all day. And, this was quite obvious with what a great mood you were in at dinner. You were so animated and talkative the whole time. It was hilarious to watch you! Anay Wanda even made the comment about how independent you are, and was amazed at how much you are talking. Grandpa Rick brought you a present too, a remote control car. You loved it and couldn't wait to open it when we got home. Before we left, you said thank you again to Grandpa Rick and even went over to track him down to give him a hug. Once home, you had us cracking up, learning how to use the controls and saying, "Ooh! Oohkaayy!" every time we would tell you how it worked. You love anything electronic!

hammin' it up at dinner

trying some variations on showing that you are going to be 3 this year...diligently working on your finger coordination

you were a bit slap happy by the end of the meal

learning how to use your new RC car

Well, while you may love anything electronic, I just love anything Mali.
Mama

Snow outside, snuggles inside

Maliana ~

Just tore myself from bed after putting you down for a nap with Daddy. It has snowed a lot this week, leaving an abundant white blanket outside our windows. It is beautiful, and very cold. This afternoon, you insisted on both Daddy and I snuggling under the covers with you, until you fell asleep. Your routine lately has been, helping to recite your bedtime stories (mostly your Llama Llama books), and then this afternoon you treated us to some singing. I love hearing your little voice singing "You Are My Sunshine", your "ABC's", and "Baa Baa Black Sheep". Your ABC's made Daddy and I giggle as you blended together LMNOP into one long funny sound by flicking your tongue in and out. As you finally quieted down, first by copying exactly how Daddy was laying, and then by falling asleep with your face no more than two inches from mine on our pillow...I got that familiar warm and snugly feeling that I get in one of "those moments"...the ones that I wish I could freeze in time forever. It was hard for us to get up from the warmth of that bed, but alas, a Mommy and Daddy's jobs are never done.

Anyway, I do have some phenomenal news from this morning. Your diaper was dry when you woke up! When we got you dressed and made the discovery, I was ecstatic. And of course, you were too when you realized what a big deal it is! Daytime has been a breeze to stay dry for a while now, but nighttime with no accidents is the next big milestone. We'll keep working on it, but you are on your way! I am so proud of you!

This afternoon we headed to Wai Gong's to check on him since his wrist surgery, and before his heart catheterization. He is doing much better and you played with everyone while there. Seems like the big theme today was tying shoes...Memaw Lisa and Blaize both did re-ties for you. You watched their every move, and keep trying to do it yourself. Memaw Lisa even made the comment that she wouldn't be surprised if you were tying your own shoes soon!

playing with a cool car game Blaize brought out for you

And of course, you conned Wai Gong into some yummy ice cream (instead of your dinner!) One of the many perks of being a grandpa, I suppose...spoiling your grandkids and undermining Mom and Dad.

Going back to the beginning of the week, it didn't start out the greatest. We took you to the doctor on Monday, who told us that you just seemed to have the "creeping crud". A nasty cold that they can't really do much for, and then on Tuesday when you went to school, you told your teachers that you didn't want to eat your macaroni and cheese at lunch, or go play outside (highly unlike you) and instead took a 3 hour nap!! When I picked you up, you were snacking on Ms. Brandi's own banana from home. She said she was worried about you and when you looked like you wanted some, she shared it since she just wanted you to get something in your belly. She is a really sweet and caring teacher. We are so fortunate. Luckily, when you woke up, you appeared to be nearly feeling back to normal. Anyway, we headed to Kroger's to pick up some foods that you would like, to make sure you kept on eating to fight off whatever this was. You definitely must have been feeling better because as I pushed you around the store in the special "race car cart", you kept singing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" at the top of your lungs. It was really cute. It's amazing what wonderful medicine sleep can be.

Later this week, you were my little helper. You helped me snap green beans for dinner one night, as we watched Hannah Montana on TV. Let me just say, you are quite the snapper! Who knew? And your other unofficial job now is to help me put away the silverware when we unload the dishwasher. It's a great sorting activity for you, and you seem to enjoy it. In fact, being any kind of assistance to me, Daddy, your teachers, or most anyone else brings you such joy and a sense of accomplishment.

Friday when I picked you up from school, Ms. Brandi made the comment on how independent you are, which was evident when Audrey Ayi and I took you out for a bite to eat (Chinese Garden, of course). As we sat down and ordered our drinks, without my even asking you, you looked at the server and said, "Juice please". Then proceeded to pull some chapstick out of your pocket and put it on (I didn't even know you had it). Not even 3 years old, yet somehow going on 13 (at least!) When I took you to the bathroom, you of course did it all yourself (which has become the norm), only opening the bathroom stall door to proudly show me the dogs on your underwear. Ha ha ha! When we walked into the restaurant, the host recognized you from last week and said (to you) smiling, "Hi! You're back!" I guess we are getting to be quite the regulars here. You and Audrey were also really cute today, taking turns writing various words and pictures on the napkins as I finished my dinner. In fact, I didn't realize this but 3 of the servers actually were standing right behind our booth, just watching and grinning at you. They also kept bringing you things like their own personal candy from the Chinese grocery, a key chain with the Chinese Garden logo, and one of them even folded an origami bird for you out of some sort of wrapper. It was really sweet of them.

Audrey Ayi helping you practice letter writing on the napkins at China Garden

After bath time, Audrey Ayi stayed and helped tuck you in

Saturday was a fun family day. In the morning, you watched Daddy wrap up his P90X workout, then insisted on doing some yourself. You love to exercise! We headed to Rock My Bao Bao (awesome to see the other kids after a long break) and then on the way home, we stopped at Giant Eagle to grab some odds and ends. We stayed to eat some lunch from their deli. We saw a policeman getting some coffee from Starbucks there, and you waved at him and then turned to me (initially calling him a fireman, and then a policeman), but saying "Protect me" while you gave yourself a big hug, miming "protecting". It was really cool. You are learning (and retaining) all sorts of things, every day!

Mmmm...Giant Eagle has an awesome cafe/deli to munch on lunch

Tonight, we headed over to Mia, Fred, and Michelle's house. What a wonderful evening! They are some of the nicest people...and you and Mia are like two peas in a pod! It was amazing to watch the two of you play together. The evening was full of giggles and laughter, mixed with the occasional, usual toddler negotiations to share, etc. I love being around other families who look like ours, and you thought it was really cool when on the way over, I reminded you that Mia had also been born in China and had come all the way home on an airplane with her mom and dad too. You lit up when I said that. You and Mia really worked well together, taking turns, mothering each other as you gave one another rides in the doll stroller (pretending to be each other's mommy), playing guitar with Fred, playing ring around the rosie, and making both Daddy and Fred do push ups with you girls piled on their backs. The peals of laughter were such music to all of our ears.

@ the dinner table

Look at how hard our daddies are working, just to get laughs from us! Boy, do they love us!!

obsessed with guitars

Fred and Michelle said that they had not yet seen Mia take so well to another child, which made it all the more heartwarming to see how well you both hit it off. At one point, you and Mia were in the bathroom together while you "dropped a bomb". You girls were just chatting it up, Mia getting you toilet paper, and you trying to fix your pants. I pulled Michelle over and said, "Flash forward about 14 years, and we'll probably see this same scene, except they'll be getting ready to go out and wanting to borrow one of our cars." We both laughed, but the scary part is, 14 years is not that far away. Oh, how fast you will grow up. Like a saying one of my co-workers said to me this week that really struck me, "The days may be long, but the years fly by." How true that is. How true that is.

Promise me one thing Mali, just this one thing. Please don't try to grow up too fast. Enjoy your youth, embrace your silliness, and savor every moment of carefree abandon that youth affords you. Adulthood comes, whether you want it to or not, with all of its various responsibilities and ups and downs. So slow down and be a kid. There will always be time to grow up, but none of us can really go back again. However, as Lao Lao said to me today, one of the joys of having children, is the permission to become a child again yourself. And you my dear, are a wonderful inspiration to me, and everyone you touch. We can forget our worries for those precious moments when we are in your presence, and just be. Be free to feel the joy of childhood, through your eyes, experiencing the wonders of the world for the first time again. And it is pure magic.

Love,
Mama

Reminiscing and Looking Ahead ~ 2011 Here We Come!!!

Happy New Year Maliana!

What a year 2010 has been, I don't think it could have gone any better. However, I have a feeling I'll be saying this about every year from now on, since you are home with us.

I actually found some quiet moments and took the opportunity this past week to do some reading and reflecting. Thinking about how we all came to be at this exact moment in time, together. All of the tumblers that had to fall into place to create this magical combination that we now call family. One person that I have really been pondering a lot lately is your birth mother. I know that your feelings and thoughts about her could run the gamut from one end of the spectrum to the other, however no matter how you feel or what you think, I also hope that you feel safe enough with your dad and I to be able to talk about what you are going through as you get older and try to piece together your history. No matter how you feel or what you think, it will always be the "correct" response to learning about and wondering about your history. There is no wrong way to react.

And aside from the whole range of emotions I have had when I think about your beginnings, I definitely want two things to be clear to you. There is and will always be a very deep sense of both respect and gratitude, for your birth mother and the difficult choices she had to make nearly 3 years ago. I just wish there was some way that I could know more about her, about why she did what she did, and to let her know that we are going to do the best that we possibly can to make sure that you live a life full of love and support. It will be interesting in the coming years, to see how you process your adoption. I just hope I can be the mother you need, providing the love and tools necessary so that you can navigate this journey for yourself. Time will tell.

Along with my reflections, I also wanted to include some other highlights from the final week of 2010. Daddy and I both picked you up from school on Monday and when we asked you where you wanted to go to eat an early dinner, you thought for a minute and then replied, “Hawaii”. Ha ha ha…us too, us too. I guess we need to be more specific that we mean a restaurant preferably in Central Ohio when we ask you that from now on. We ended up at the Chinese Garden Buffet and had a great dinner. You and I went to the bathroom and met a native Chinese woman there. She spoke broken English and so there was a lot of gesturing in our conversation, however as we both watched you, she asked if you were my only “baby” and if you were from China. I said yes, and then she communicated that I needed to go back over to China and get “two babies”, bring another child home. I got a lump in my throat when I realized this is what she was saying, since this particular decision has been weighing on Daddy and me lately. A few days ago, I even asked God/the Universe for a sign, if this was what we were supposed to do. Pretty interesting, huh? Anyway, after dinner we headed to Polaris so you could play on their indoor playground. You took a liking to these scrolling ads in the middle of the mall that played all sorts of various songs, many of which had some wicked beats. Well, you must have felt it in your bones because you started grooving to this music and danced your little heart out. Pretty soon, you had drawn crowds of various people as they walked by, stopping to check out your antics. We got some awesome video of it. We were cracking up ~ you’ve got some moves girl, some of them kind of “gangsta”. I have no idea where you picked them up, but it’s hysterical.

Later this week, we turned on the TV, which we really had not had on in a while. Hannah Montana was on and you watched a few episodes of it. You are now calling her “Anna Tana” and every time a commercial comes on, you say “More Anna Tana Mommy”.

On Friday, I was off work for the New Year holiday and so we spent the day together. I let you open our Christmas presents to you that were leftover from Christmas day and you especially loved the magnetic puzzles and art set. You spent a ton of time with the art set (particularly the watercolors) and it was the quietest you have been in a long time. I remember how cool it was to get an art set when I was little, and it looks like you feel the same way I did.

enjoying your art set in the buff

After you got your art time in, you and I headed out with Abby to go for a jog since the weather was so unseasonably warm. After playing on the playground, I let you run with me for a bit and I think you jogged for nearly a half mile before getting back in your stroller.

Needless to say, once home, you were ready for a nap. We got out the 3 books I got you for Christmas, all about adoption, (I Love You Like Crazy Cakes, Every Year on Your Birthday, and Mama’s Wish/Daughter’s Wish). I got teary as I read these to you for the first time. You actually fell asleep in mid-story. The picture below, I felt captures where you are somehow. Safely snuggled in your Mommy and Daddy’s big warm bed, however at your feet lies where you have been. Tales of birth parents who are far away, the journey of adoption, and feeling the love of family while at the same time trying to find a way to reconcile and honor your origins. I know that that probably doesn’t adequately describe where you really are, however that is what came to my mind and I do love this picture.

On New Year’s Eve night, the Metz’s and Audrey came over to ring in the new year. You girls wore us all out, so we pretty much pooped out shortly after you and Niubei went to bed. But, before you both hit the hay, you had us laughing so hard at what I can only describe as the infamous “Toddler Dance Party of 2010”. Daddy actually got a lot of this on video, and I really wish there was a way for me to download that on this blog. Describing it does not do it justice. However, I will say that you have some new moves that include something like the sprinkler, a “Grease Lightening” move, and then another move where you got behind Niubei when she bent over to pick up her juice and just "did your thang". Seriously, your moves are not those of a two year old…they had all of us cracking up.

here you are enjoying a little Elefun with Niubei

New Year’s Day we headed over to Memaw and Papaw’s for pork and sauerkraut. You squealed so loudly when we told you that your cousins were going to be there, and as I watched you running around all night with Joey, Alex, and Sammy, I just kept thinking how wonderful it is that you are just “one of the gang”. My cousins were all so much younger than me, plus I didn’t see them very often at all, so it’s nice to see you thoroughly fitting in and enjoying your cousins so much. From what Aunt Beth and Uncle Kevin said, the girls were just as excited to see you too. I love it! As we left, Papaw made the comment to you, “You’re so precious”…I have to agree.

one of the more hilarious pictures of all of you...you are counting Memaw's teeth and Sammy just wants the heck out of there!

This morning, after giving me a “haircut” (thankfully using pretend scissors), you and Daddy had a date. It wasn’t planned, but turned out to be a wonderful outing for the two of you. You headed to Easton and had some Starbucks together, then took the trolley around Easton (with the driver (whose daughter was also born with a cleft lip and palate) even letting you ring the bell), and then walked around to take a last look at all the Christmas decorations before they inevitably will come down this week. Daddy was ecstatic when you got home. He really loved spending this one on one time with you.

on the trolley with Daddy

After you got home, you and I laid down for a nap. You have started feeling a bit under the weather with a nasty cough. I told you, in a moment of empathy, that if I could take your cough away, I would. So today, you kept asking me to “Take away cough Mama” and motioning like you were taking something out of your mouth. You poor thing ~ we’ll call the doctor tomorrow. After our nap, Memaw and Papaw came over and we had dinner and celebrated Christmas with them. They really outdid themselves with gifts for us, and I was so pleased to see you really cherish every single one, doing a great job of thanking them for each gift. I think your favorite one of the night was your very own MP3 player. You kept begging us to take it downstairs and get it spooled up with your music, but settled for just carrying it around in your jeans pocket all evening. When you first opened it and realized what it was, you turned and informed me, “Don’t touch my music, ok?” Ha ha. I suppose that’s only fair since you hear that a lot from both Daddy and I. A close second was the doctor’s kit. Upon opening it, you proceeded to doctor up both Memaw and Papaw, telling them, “Don’t cry, ok?” All in all, it was a really nice and relaxed celebration. When Memaw and Papaw left, you saw them to the door, telling them, “Goodbye ~ be careful”. Then once they were to their car, you closed the front door, and locked it, all by yourself. Then swaggered up the stairs like a little adult ~ I love your little mannerisms, you are so grown up!

You and Daddy went to bed, but a while later, you came back downstairs. I guess you were having trouble sleeping with this nasty cough and congestion of yours. We sat and watched a little bit of the movie Bolt, and I was surprised to see you begin to cry when the dog left his friends and it appeared as though he would not find his way home to his little girl. Heck, I even started crying too at the end when it looked like the dog and his little girl were actually going to die (I still don’t know why these kids’ movies can be such tear jerkers!) And just a little while earlier tonight, you also got teary as we read your new book from Memaw and Papaw, Llama Llama Misses Mama, a tale about Llama Llama going to school for the first time. You kept needing reassured that Mama Llama would come back to pick him up. These are the first times I have observed your sensitivity in such a way. It was really sweet. I tried to comfort you during the movie, and we watched until the end, because I knew that ultimately it would turn out ok. I hate to see you upset, but it really touched me to see your tears because I am the same way. I can get emotional at the drop of a hat when I see something sad, or even something happy for that matter. This is also neat because it is just another sign of you growing up, maturing, a sign of your developing empathy for others, and it is wonderful. Sometimes it is hard to be this emotional, but I’d much rather be this way than the alternative.

So in summary, going back to the same pondering that started out this entry, as we enter 2011, we can embrace every moment we have with each other, laughing at ourselves and making memories in this new year. We can look ahead to the future with all of the beautiful hopes and dreams of a fresh start each new day. However, we also can carry those important pieces of ourselves and the people of our past with us. We can hold them dear and honor them for their gifts, no matter how painful or joyous they may have been. Because ultimately, they will always be here with us. They reside inside us, since they contributed to the creation of who we are today. For that (and for them), I am forever grateful.

Happy New Year, my sweet Maliana Suirong. May this year, and all coming years, bless you with abundant love and happiness all the days of your life.

Love,
Mama