Halloween, Girls' Night, and Somewhere Between

Maliana ~

Hurricane Sandy was about to make landfall in New York by Monday evening and with all of the wind, rain, and grey skies reaching even into Ohio, we decided it was a perfect day to eat some nice warm soup and hot cocoa at Panera after school. When I told you where we were going, you squealed and jumped up and down. I love that you enjoy the simple pleasures so much.

And what with Hurricane Sandy wreaking havoc in the northeast...a little bit of her might reached all the way into Ohio with wind and rain through much of the week. Halloween's Beggar's Night festivities were a bit dampened (quite literally). Along with it being cold and consistently drizzly all day, you also decided to forego a nap at school...so we had a very tired, cold, wet, and eventually hungry monkey with us. We made the best of it and hit about ten houses in my old Cherrington Rd neighborhood before we found ourselves throwing in the towel and warming up at our favorite local Chinese buffet. All's well that ends well.

all ready to head out for some candy

your own twist on your costume...
it's Super Monkey!

Lao Lao was in charge of revving
you up on our way out for
Beggar's Night



but wait...asleep already?!?!?!
that'll teach you to skip your nap on Halloween
(down for the count before we even arrived at
our first Trick or Treat destination)

Mom, Dad, and a sleepy Mali in front of the
house on Cherrington where I spent
much of my childhood

 

by far, the coolest house on our route

who needs candy when you can have
egg drop soup?!

After not napping on Halloween, November 1st you made sure you took a full 2 hour nap at school, telling your teacher, "My mom is going to be so happy." And I sure was! You cracked me up again later in the bathtub, showing off how you can dunk yourself while washing and rinsing your own hair, proudly adding, "Yeah, I'm a big kid. Big kids can do all kinds of stuff." Ha.

By Friday, I got a taste of how you and I would do in a crisis (ok, pseudo-crisis...but you get the gist). We came out of speech to find my car with a nearly flat tire. I needed gas too, so I figured I'd just try to get us to the nearest gas station. The ENTIRE way there I heard comments from you in the backseat, or as I was calling it, the "Peanut Gallery". "Mom, our tire is flat, just call Dad." "Mom, the other tires are ok, but that one is FLAT!" "Mom, just call Dad!" "Mom, we are not gonna make it. Our tire is flat." "Mom, where are we going??" and I can't forget to mention the exasperated sighs thrown in there, after every other statement, simply for effect and to show me how much you figured I totally could NOT handle this situation. When we finally made it to the gas station, you wanted to help (no surprise there). Of course, after hopping around and inspecting all of the tires and the air machine, you shut the car door and for a good minute I thought you had locked us out of the car (yes, if you were listening, you learned how to correctly use the word "Shit!" in a sentence). After figuring out that one of the doors was still unlocked (thank God), I told you to get back in the car and stay there until I was done, and went back to filling the tires in peace. However, when I opened my door to check on you again, you gave me an ear full. "Mom, I have had a bad day too." and "Mom, I'm only four years old. But I can do all kinds of big stuff too!" Yep, you're right sweetie. You are right. Of course, I apologized at that point. I am definitely willing to admit to my mistakes and own up to my freak-outs. We finally got the air in the tires and our gas tank filled up, even going inside to let you pick out a pack of gum all for yourself. All's well that ends well, right? (Hmmm, isn't that the second time I've said that this week? Ha ha).

cutest mechanic ever

That evening we headed to Uncle Blaize's high school production of The Awesome 80's Prom where Blaize played the role of Lloyd Parker, the freshman high school photographer. You were a bit sleepy and spent most of the play on my lap, overwhelmed with all of the activity, however you really enjoyed it and when you woke up on Saturday told me, "I really liked the play!" Blaize did a fantastic job and we were all excited to see him in his first performance.

Blaize doing his thing in the play

long view of the stage and performers

jump circle!

afterward...relieved to have had a
successful performance

And Saturday...to kick off the weekend, here was a Facebook status of mine:
~ so far, Mali's quote of the day.."I don't want to look beautiful, I want to look Beastie" (as in Beastie Boys...oh boy!)
Yeah, it's been that kind of Saturday. Ha.

Saturday was also Lao Lao's birthday so to celebrate we headed out for a girl's' night, just us three. We went to the Gallery Hop in the Short North, ate greek food for dinner (Opa!), and took a detour by OSU on the way home. It was so much fun, we laughed and laughed the entire night. From your insistence on taking your own camera to snap pictures of nearly all the staff at the Happy Greek, to your dancing (even falling to the ground to breakdance to Whatcha Want by the Beastie Boys) on the sidewalk, to all of our silly attempts to get pictures of you with Flat Stanley for our friend Laurel's school project. It was impossible not to laugh with you, even for people we passed on the street who would smirk, smile, laugh, and even stopped us on a couple of occasions to tell us how cute or funny you were. It was a most memorable night. You even learned a new phrase..."Run! It's the cops!" Ha ha. I look forward to many many more insanely crazy and fun nights with you!

girls' night! yee haw!!

happy girl

taking pictures of EVERYONE

the infamous flaming cheese!

Opa!

mmmm...dessert

 

busting a move on the sidewalk at Gallery Hop

 

it was so wet and mucky under those leaves,
but you were having fun!

And now, introducing Flat Stanley...our honorary girl that night!

at the Happy Greek with Flat Stanley

at the Short North with Flat Stanley

riding a turtle with Flat Stanley

at Ohio Stadium with Flat Stanley

in the dome of The Shoe with Flat Stanley

The celebration of birthdays (mine, Daddy's, Uncle Forge's, and Lao Lao's) continued on Sunday where we all met for dinner at P.F. Chang's. It was absolutely wonderful to see family that we have not seen in a while. Along with those mentioned above...Uncle Flint, cousins Amy, Chloe and Eva, Inay Wanda and Uncle Alan, and Papaw Rick were also in attendance. You were in rare form (as usual) and I loved seeing you interact with your cousins Chloe and baby Eva. We don't get to see them very often as they usually live in Tennessee but are staying here in Ohio while their daddy is in Afghanistan. Although the circumstances are tough, I look forward to you hopefully getting to know them better while they are here waiting for their daddy to return home safely.

you and Chloe helping me open my present from Inay Wanda

uncles love to tease

with your Uncle Forge

L to R
you, Lao Lao, Chloe, Amy, Inay Wanda, Eva

To rewind a little bit, there is one more important thing I want to mention for the week. Lao Lao watched you in the afternoon (before dinner at P.F. Chang's) so Daddy and I could attend a limited showing of a documentary called Somewhere Between. We laughed and cried through the entire movie, completely blown away by its honesty and heart wrenching truth. It was a film following four teenage girls as they each described their journeys of self discovery and identity, attempting to reconcile what they'd been through from birth until the present day. It was amazing. It brought so many more questions and emotions to light, being faced head on with what your future challenges could very well look like. It pains me to think that there is heartbreak in your life that no matter what I do or say, you will have to resolve on your own. As you grow, your problems will become more complex as you navigate the world with a more sophisticated frame of reference. No longer will a kiss and a bandaid suffice. Some day you will feel pain that only you will be able to remedy. And even when you may feel that it is truly unbearable, I just want you to know that you can do it. I am so grateful to the adoptive parent who had the foresight to make this film as it is surely going to be a valuable resource for you and girls like you to perhaps not feel so alone in this struggle for identity. I have already pre-ordered a copy so that you will have it when you need it. And who knows, hopefully there will be many more resources out there for you when the time comes that you need them. I was telling Daddy tonight that with how connected the world is anymore, children like you who will face these particular challenges will literally have support available at your fingertips thanks to the internet. I hope that you use it. Don't ever be afraid to seek out help or support. There is no shame in asking for a hand or a shoulder if you need it. I hope that you remember that you are never alone in all of this. While you may have to reconcile your past and your present, what it means to be you, in your own way, you are never ever alone.

You are so very very loved Maliana.

Love,
Mama

Countdown to Halloween

Maliana ~

Now tell me if you agree that this is the absolute cutest sight to see upon waking up on a cold Monday morning...

And if that wasn't the single best way to kick the dreaded Monday morning blahs, the rest of the day actually shaped up to be A-OK as well (thank God). Daddy was working late so you and I set out to create some Halloween inspired treats. I think they turned out pretty good and you really loved the whole process. You adore any opportunity you can to be helpful and/or creative.

while we didn't make these turtle caramel apples...
they were DELICIOUS!

chocolate dipped strawberry ghosts!

chocolate dipped Nutter Butter ghosts

Audrey Ayi came with me to pick you up this week after not having seen you in a while. It was awesome because when we walked in the door at school, you yelled "Audrey!" and ran right into her arms. It made her feel great...so wonderful to have such a nice reception. She sure has missed you, and vice versa!

as usual, Audrey gave you a bath that was
utter chaos and so much fun

Along with Audrey Ayi, we also had another visitor who popped in and out all night. By bedtime, he looked pretty comfortable...I don't think he wanted to leave.

Stormy, the neighbor's cat

I do have to share this story with you too...from one of our drives home from school. You were marveling at how long my arms were as I reached into the backseat to help you with something. Here's the conversation:
You: "How do your hands reach back here?"
Me: "Because I'm big."
You: "I'm big too!"
Me: "Yes, you're big. But you are only 4 and I am 37. So I'm bigger."
You: "37 !?!?!?!? Are you SERIOUS?!?!?!?!?!"
Me: "Ha, thanks a lot!"

By Friday, it was time for your school's Halloween party to which you wore your own custom-crafted costume of "Super Girl"...don't you look proud?

Saturday as we sat and ate breakfast together, you looked up at me with a big grin and said, "You are the best mommy ever!!"...and you weren't even trying to bribe me for anything. Ha ha. But seriously, moments like these (and actually a million more) are what make being a parent so rewarding. Of course, I responded with a "and you're the best daughter ever!!" because I already think that every single day.

After breakfast we headed to your Chinese dance class. I stayed in the room and tried to help you (and Mia) stay focused. Let me tell you, that was a HUGE task. A room full of 4 and 5 year olds does not have the attention span for an hour long dance class. Whew...I sure do have new respect for anyone who takes on teaching young children. Herding cats is the best only way to describe it accurately.

Later, once home, we lay down for a nap together and as we settled in I told you that I love you, once again. You let out a big sigh, evidently perturbed with my breaking the silence after having told me we needed to be quiet, and said, "Moooom...I know. You always tell me that a lot of times!" Ha. Well, I guess there are worse ways to annoy your kids. In my opinion, telling them you love them over and over and over again until they are annoyed is one way that I will happily continue to bug the crap out of you.

Saturday night we had two of your instructors from tang soo do over for dinner and a bonfire. It was really nice to see both instructor Stanley-Wolfe (Mark) and master Han outside of the do jang and enjoy their company in a more relaxed atmosphere. You were thrilled to have them over and kept asking when they would get here all afternoon. We got to know a little bit more about them confirming what we already suspected that they are some really upstanding young men. It's always nice to have a couple more solid role models in your life.

finishing up your s'more with Han (left) and Mark (right)

Sunday morning when we woke up we lounged around for a bit and opened the front door to find some surprise pumpkins on our porch...what?! Is there a pumpkin fairy??

(thank you Lao Lao and Papaw Rick)

Since Sunday was a cold, windy, and rainy day (Hurricane Sandy was on her way)...we mostly spent it indoors. I got out to do a little Christmas recon for Santa, but otherwise it was a laid back day. We did manage to put together some more Halloween treats for dinner though...

getting ready to put mummy dogs in the oven

mmm...a success!

spooky string cheese/green pepper witch fingers

we didn't make the gummy bugs, but
they were yummy nonetheless

We had so much fun being silly that it even caused an impromptu song and dance called "I love my mommy"...which you can see below via YouTube.

I love your songs!!

And Lao Lao finally was able to stop by for some fun after a few horrible weeks of work stress for her. She brought you some LED shoelaces (which are so cool) for trick or treat night...then after making a toilet paper roll owl with us she showed you how to dry glue on your hand and then peel it off like you were peeling off your zombie skin. Just in time for Halloween...thanks Lao Lao!

an art that every elementary school
kid eventually masters

Happy early Halloween!!
Love,
Mama

Undie Heads, Pumping Up, and the Girl of the Gourds

Maliana ~

You got to take a field trip on Monday for school to...wait for it...Kroger! You were SO excited to show and tell me all about it. We even took a trip back later that night for some necessities and you strolled through the produce department, telling me about it all, with much more gusto than usual. It was very cute.

Then Tuesday was a big day for our friend Cadence who had surgery to close a hole in her heart. I was glued to Facebook through the day as there were updates here and there. Her mom Stacy had asked for whoever was moved to do so to send good vibes, positive thoughts, prayers, chants, or even dance in their living rooms with underwear on their heads to bring good results for KK. I am happy to announce that Cadence made it through the procedure and it went well. And can you guess how we chose to send our good vibes to Cadence? I'll give you three guesses...

undie heads!

After finding out the good news about Cadence, we dug out the last pumpkin from the patch a couple weekends ago and finally carved it up. I let you design and carve the entire thing yourself and I think you did fabulously!

you still have all ten fingers, SCORE!

You also worked out with Daddy this week. It had been a while since you both had gone to the gym together and as you can see in the video below, you were definitely making up for lost Crossfit time!

Pumping up with Daddy!!

Pumping up at the gym will also come in handy for your latest career aspiration. Super Hero. After reading the following book several times this week, you are enamored with the thought of fighting crime and helping people. Every time I read this to you, I love how you discreetly flex and check your own muscles. Ha.

I also love the message of this book that no matter
your size, anyone can make a difference!

Saturday we headed to the monthly Fu Social Outing that Daddy and I had volunteered to organize for October. It was the perfect month to have everyone come out to Dill's Greenhouse for their Fall Fun Fest. Uncle Kevin and Papaw also work at Dill's and so Joey, Alex, and Sammy got to come hang out with us all too. It was cold and windy, but we had a good time nonetheless. You haven't gotten to see your cousins much lately, so you were especially stoked to spend time with them and also go out and play like crazy at their house after we left Dill's. It makes me so happy that you adore your cousins so much, even if it means that Mom is, "like so completely uncool" whenever they are around. Ha ha.

barrel rides

sliding with Sammy and Alex

sliding with Joey

gorgeous girl of the gourds

Daddy carrying my purse around the
pumpkin patch
(FYI: the willingness to do something that perhaps
makes you look foolish and also the ability to
laugh at yourself is a huge asset in life...
always remember that sweetie)

driving the Gator with your cousin Sammy

Sunday we had a surprisingly good time together with a movie and then, if you can believe it, the grocery store! You requested to go on a family date so we took you to see Ice Age 2. It was actually a really good movie with lots of action, laughs and some really nice messages. Within the first few minutes you were loudly belly laughing and continued to get a kick out of the entire thing, even watching the credits with rapt attention while standing up in the aisle.

After the theatre we headed to the grocery store and the fun just continued on...at least for one of us. Can you tell which one?

your laughing was cracking us all up

Nothing was too crazy or unusual about our Sunday, but your silliness and exuberance all day long made it a memorable end to the weekend.

 

Love you sweet cheeks.

 

Mama 

2 Birthdays, a Dance Class, and a Couple of Goofballs

Maliana ~

The week began with a very tired bedtime on Monday, which usually equals a lot of drama. It was no exception on this night. However, you felt better when I gathered you onto my chest and lay there in bed with you. And regardless of what else I wanted to accomplish after your bedtime, I just stayed there with you, soaking in the moments, recognizing that you wouldn't always be this small or might not always be this willing to accept my comfort. For several moments, my world just stopped and I was able to savor the way your little head smelled or how your breathing slowed as you drifted into slumber, the sound of you sucking on your tongue and the intermittent wiggles as you fell deeper and deeper into sleep. That stuff...that's the good stuff.

Tuesday was a little more upbeat though as it was Daddy's birthday! Since it was a weekday, it wasn't exactly party central for poor Daddy. But we did surprise him after work with balloons, flowers, and a cake which made him smile after a long day at work.

You've continued to perfect your shoe-tying abilities and by Thursday of this week, you showed your teacher how you can tie both of your shoes when I came to pick you up...Ms. Beth was very impressed! And excited because now it's one less kid she has to chase down to re-tie shoes during the day. Ha ha.

You also made a beautiful picture for me on Friday at school. When I commented on it and how lovely the colors were, you said, "Mom, that's for you! Because you like pretty things!" Here it is, isn't it grand?

there's a person in there, if you look closely,
which you said was me

Saturday we got up and headed to our second Chinese dance class. You were still hesitant but participated a bit more than last time about which I was very glad.

both of you and Mia were ambivalent but at
least you're not on our laps this time!

participating, even if from a distance

edging closer to the class

helping Mia out with her shoestrings

now helping another new friend out
with her shoestrings too

adn then even more customers for help
with their shoestrings

it's no surprise then that you found tying your friends' shoelaces
more interesting than Chinese dance class since nearly every
day for the last two weeks, this has been what your
report from your teacher has said

After class we went to Panera with Mia and Michelle. Mia is so sweet and you girls are so silly. Hamming it up towards the end of our visit, as you can see.

Drove home, had some brief quiet time, and then we were off again to Erin's birthday party at Magic Mountain! You were so tired since you hadn't had a proper nap, but by the time you all were let loose to play in the crazy play areas there, you got a second wind and went nuts like all the other kids.

so smitten with your dance leotard that
you wanted to wear it to the party...
with red cowboy boots of course!

hanging off the back of the firetruck
with your buddy Bert

you LOVED playing firefighter

you kept hysterically going back to this mirror and
having a very spirited discussion with yourself

this one just makes me laugh

 

Happy Birthday E!

And finally Sunday was just a gloriously lazy day. Headed to Uncle Joe and Aunt Tina's to meet their new puppy Alice (who is ADORABLE and so well behaved), and then went home to do nothing but relax. It was awesome and much needed. Now hopefully we have re-energized ourselves enough for the week ahead.

Love,
Mama