More Pandemic? a Vaccine, a Teenager? and New Beginnings!

Mali,

Well, darlin'. January through March of 2021 has come and gone. We are not only surpassing an entire year of a pandemic where our lives have been turned upside down but you also are surpassing a milestone in your life - teenage-hood! With that being said...as you can tell...my blog entries are becoming more sparse as of late. Much of this is due to your ability to form your own memories as you blossom into an (almost) fully grown human with your own identity and opinions (a large one of which you would prefer me to not take as many pictures of you). So, that being said...I've laid off the frequency of blog entries. However, the frequency of how many times I have annoyed you in any given day has increased. It's all about balance. See? Teen-dom.

So, first, I will not spend a lot of time on this but I would be remiss if I did not at least mention it here. The insurrection of January 6th. Yes, it was real and we all lived through watching it unfold on the news. The vileness and hatred of it all was not exaggerated. It is insane that it happened here in America in 2021...or maybe it's not. I don't know. Anyway, there, I mentioned it. If you're curious, look it up. Jesus Christ. *shakes head*

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Unfortunately, the insurrection wasn't the only traumatic event so far this year. Sadly, due to the most recent previous president's ignorant and hateful rhetoric, coupled with the already deep-seated racism within this country, there has been a significant uptick in the amount of violence against the Asian-American/Pacific Islander (AAPI) community over the last year. In the face of all this darkness, there are also many people who are shining a light and waking up, standing up, working together to combat this racist wave, and supporting the AAPI community, but it's still been quite traumatizing. There was a vigil organized by students at a Dublin high school near the end of March that Lao Lao and I attended. I invited you, as well, but you declined to spend time with your friend, Avery, instead. Not until I got home with you that night, did I understand why you declined ~ fear of further violence at the event. An understandable and valid concern. You and I ended up sitting at the table that night and having a wonderfully deep and meaningful, important conversation about how you feel about being Asian-American as well as a trans-racial adoptee, your experiences thus far as both, thoughts about your birth parents, how you are understanding and processing current issues, and so much more. On the one hand, I hate that these struggles exist (for you and all in the AAPI community) and that they are just a natural and necessary part of your navigation in life, but I am also incredibly grateful that you feel safe enough to share all of this with me. It's a privilege (to me) that you allow me in these deep and sometimes confusing or painful spaces in your heart and mind. I truly hope that you always feel safe enough to talk to me about any of this...and I hope you also always remember that I will do everything in my power to help clear the path so that this navigation can be smoother for you in the future. Lord knows I will mess up and I won't do everything perfectly, but you can always count on me to keep my mind and heart open so that I can continue learning and (hopefully) do better moving forward. 

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After dealing with two very heavy topics at the outset of this post...you may need a palate cleanser, so here are a bundle of cute pics with our fur babies to get you back on track....

you're both asleep in that picture...

this is what happens at night...the animals gather around me...

catnip frenzy!

look at GG's arm on Grizz's neck

sound asleep...

Lucky likes to burrow

making sure your butt is ok

such a handsome kitty

waiting for you to come out of your room

GG is on your lap, Grizz at your feet

that does not look comfortable

dancing at prom?

Lucky is using Pip's belly roll to cover his eyes from the sun

"bad dog!"

naps are still very popular during the pandemic

Pip is channeling all of us feeling totally over the pandemic

GG is always such a lovebug to his siblings

Pip's gone radioactive under the lights in your room

Pip has no idea her world is about to get rocked

window hammock for the kitties

Kevin!

Holy cow, we take a lot of pictures of our pets! It will be nice to begin going places and taking pictures of things that aren't covered in fur once this pandemic is behind us. Jeez-ow! LOL

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Moving right along, I'll change gears to mention a hilarious conversation you and Daddy had the other night in the car:

M: When did you first see Mom?

Shawn: Back in 1997. I saw her a couple days before I asked her out.

(psst, here's what we would have looked like...)

M: Wouldn't it have been funny if Mom had been wearing a backpack and when you went up to talk to her, I popped out and said, "Hey, I'm your future kid!"?

Shawn: *laughing so hard he almost drove off the road*

LOL ~ you crack us up, kiddo. 

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Right along with the topic of hilarious conversations, you and I had another one, one morning in late March...

M: *coming out of your room in the morning* "I've had Bob Ross on, muted, in my room since 10am."

Me: "You have? Why muted?"

M: "Because, it's Bob Ross...boom...looking right into your soul."

Me: 🤔🤷

LOL!

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In February, I attended your annual IEP meeting with school staff and teachers (this year over Zoom, of course), and I was incredibly and pleasantly surprised. It was first thing in the morning and honestly, the best way to start my day. You see, back in elementary school, these meetings were so emotional for me and felt so foreign and complicated, not only because I was so new to them but also because we had so much to figure out about how to best help you unlock all of your capabilities. I am elated to report that for the last few years, you have been making huge strides in being able to persist and meet challenges when given the right tools to do so. Even during this God-awful pandemic year, I've watched your abilities grow in spite of, or maybe because of, the need to take charge of more responsibility and self-reliance in your school work. Each of your teachers mentioned how much they enjoy you, your participation in class, your growing ability to advocate for yourself and work independently, and of course, your sense of humor (I found out that during attendance in one class, you will reply "What's up, best friend?!" to your teacher. Ha) Anyway, all of this to say, I'm so grateful that not only are these IEP services available to all of our kiddos who need them, but also for the caring, supportive teachers and staff that make school safe and learning fun. And of course, I'm over the moon that I was picked to be your, (my little chicken nugget's) mom. So proud of who you are as a human. ❤

P.S. as I finished typing a version of this update on Facebook so I could share my joy, I also heard you muttering to yourself as you complete a difficult project, "Ugh. I hate school. *sigh*" so, just so you know, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. But, in spite of that, it's still pretty good. 😉

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Along with enjoying the hell out of being your mama, we also tried to enjoy time outdoors during this very cold, long, up and down winter. 

you haven't been super cooperative about pictures lately so, these were the best I could get

Orion's belt over that tree (just to its top left)

deer bedding down in the back

deer coming on into the hood to get some snacks

and even a coyote!

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Before the big, big, BIG(!) event of the first quarter of 2021 (ahem...a certain teenager's birthday!)...we celebrated the Lunar New Year ~ Year of the Ox! Normally, we would be out getting dim sum (since you've never been a big fan of the lion dance) but with Covid this year, we decided to make our own feast of dumplings, steamed buns, tteokbokki (upon your request), and nian gao (or as you call it, jiggly cake), at home. It turned out wonderfully and was different than the norm but just as yummy! 

tteokbokki!

nian gao!

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And now...drumroll, please...

As of March 6th, you are officially a teenager! Woo hoo! The following will be a series of Facebook posts that were shared to recap the shenanigans both on that day and then a week prior when we had a dual birthday celebration for you and Avery at the LaVeque Tower hotel downtown. It began as a surprise for Avery and turned out to be a fantastic time for you both! I'm so glad that you and Avery have grown so much closer lately and also that Kelly invited us along!

Here are some pictures from the pre-birthday shenanigans with Avery, Kelly, and Evan...

don't ask! LOL

spontaneous walk and scooter riding through the Columbus Commons at night

scooters at the Statehouse!

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You also got a few other surprises, too. I let you pick out a signature scent of cologne from the mall...I think this one's called Open Road. You were so excited and have been wearing it daily ever since you got it. 

And Kelly surprised us with a special cake, just for you! BTS! It looks awesome...surpassed any and all of our expectations! More close ups of the cake later...

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And now...from your ACTUAL birthday!

Here is Dad's birthday message to you:

It's 5:30 AM and I can't sleep. Why, you ask? It's my kiddo's 13th birthday!! Officially a teenager. This kid has brought so much joy to us and everyone they meet. We are better people because of Mali.

Teri Kate

and I are beyond proud and blessed to have this amazing person to be our child.

Mali, I want to wish you the happiest of birthdays. Mom and I love you so much. More than you'll ever know. Enjoy your day today munchkin. You deserve it!!

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Prior to actually coming out of your bedroom, you lie in bed and got to read tons of sweet birthday messages from your friends...here was Avery's which I thought was so kind.

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Here are my recaps from Facebook as we spent our day of shenanigans to celebrate:

Round 1 of the birthday surprises for our newly minted teenager. 13 years old. How is that possible?! I'm so glad that at this age, they still enjoy our traditions of a birthday breakfast surprise and their star donut tower (a baker's dozen this year!) Big props to

Shawn

and his excited insomnia for getting up early to decorate...it looks amazing I can't imagine what we did to get so lucky but we sure won the kid lottery when Mali was placed in our arms. HaPpY BiRtHdAy, M...you are SO loved!!!

Round 2 of birthday shenanigans was at Dreamscape @ Easton, a VR experience at the Alien Zoo. If you've never done this before, it's worth it! They have a few different adventures to choose from and it feels like you are actually inside the world they have created. 4 dimensional and so realistic. So much fun!

Also...they limit entry per adventure to just 6 at a time so we had the entire room to ourselves and felt very safe with all of their covid/sanitization protocols.

And this was a surprise from Uncle Flint and Monica (via Amazon) when we came home...

3rd and final round of today's birthday celebration...cutting into that gorgeous cake with Memaw and Papaw!

And being the official 13 year old they are now...the last picture is M in their natural teenage habitat: texting friends. 😉

After all of the shenanigans were done, just the three of us had a giant, sweaty, chaotic, laugh-filled dance party before bed. We were belly-laughing on the floor while playing and dancing to Cardi B, BTS, Black Pink, Black-eyed Peas, the LemonadeMouth soundtrack, and many more. We have created so many funny memories with you, especially with you as the 'dancing machine toddler' ~ which is what totally inspired this spontaneous dance party. I love our family. 💜

Happy 13th, Punkin!

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With spring pretty much at our doorstep, it was time to spring forward. This time change is a bit rougher since we lose an hour. I'm not sure why they chose to send all of you kids back to school full-time (vs being hybrid) on the same week there was a time change, but that's what happened. Anyhoo, you did great at the beginning but were fizzling by the end of the week. We had a rough evening on Thursday and also Friday morning, (teen 'tude in full effect), but once you got home, we both were doing better. It's hard, as a mom, to know what to do or how to respond as you watch your teenager pull away from you as they become more independent. I always remind myself that this is normal and healthy and if you weren't doing this in some fashion is when I should actually worry...but it still feels like being forced into learning a foreign language that you're not quite prepared to do and where you spend much of your time confused. LOL Ahhh...teenage-hood. 

That same night we ended up losing our electricity and so instead of being stuck in a dark house indefinitely, you and I hopped in the car, headed to Starbucks, and then hit the open road to listen to music and sing along while we wove back and forth through country roads. It was a good time with good talks, and a spontaneous gift from you. You put on Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift (which you often do on these sing-alongs in the car) while mentioning, "you might cry, Mom") and told me that you remember me singing this to you every night at bedtime while I tickled your back. You know, kid...you may be growing up and pulling away right now as you find a more solid identity of your own, but it was reassuring to be reminded that we have this memory and many more together that have been so meaningful to the both of us. They definitely ease the sting of missing you during this particular time of your growing years. And I look forward to making more new memories with you as the years tick by. 

I suppose this may or may not be the best place to insert a really cool analogy I found on Twitter about grief. You know, since part of parenting is simultaneously grieving your kiddo when they were tiny while still being so excited to watch them grow into their full potential as a teen and then adult. It's a mixed bag. And grief?Unfortunately, it's unavoidable in life in big and small ways for a multitude of reasons...from a pandemic all the way down to your new teenager pulling away to become an independent adult. Anyway, here is the analogy...I hope it helps you as it's helped me since I found it. 

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On a side (but also kinda HUGE central) note after a long, precarious year filled with challenges of all kinds from the pandemic, I got my 1st Covid-19 vaccine on 3/19 and Dad got his on 3/26!! Yahoo, right?! They are currently doing trials on kids and so it's only a matter of time until we can all be vaccinated. To say I'm stoked would be a vast understatement. I may or may not have cried when I got the shot...and knowing me, you know...I totally cried. 

Aunt Tina and I went on the same day and had tequila shots to celebrate our vaccine shots!

And this is the plant that I am resurrecting after a long winter...see the heart-shaped bud?

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Here's to new beginnings...both of a new year and a new(ish) way of life again once the vaccines have kicked in for ALL of us! Soon, baby...soon!

Love you so much, kiddo...or should I say, teen-o, now? Haha. 

Meh, kiddo still works for me. 

Love,

Mama