Mr. and Mrs. God and "Black Guy Susans"

Maliana ~

This upcoming week is crunch time as I finish up this blog, get work caught up so I can take time off, and prep for both your Family Day party and our visitors from Virginia. I feel like so much is happening all at once that I can't keep up with anything, and that includes the thoughts in my head. That being said, if I sound a little crazy or disjointed, well, that's why. Anyhoo...here we go.

This past Monday was a rotten day for both of us. You began blinking again and even had to go to the nurse for a belly-ache at school (both signs we have come to recognize as ways your body communicates that you are under stress). With these red flags going up all at once, we decided it best to push the pause button and head to Hoover for a little time to reconnect with each other and forget about our troubles for a while. Skipping rocks and chatting in the woods was just what the doctor ordered to turn our day around.

writing each other surprise messages
in the sand on the bank

skipping rocks

when you saw this picture, you asked "were there colors in the
olden days?" ...after much questioning, I found out that you thought
perhaps people used to be just shades of grey based on the appearance
of old black and white photos...pretty interesting
observation from my little scientist!

Along with dealing with some new 'big kid type' stress at school lately, you've also begun doing your own hair as well. You work hard on it too. A prelude of your teenage years, I'm sure.

look at that concentration

I call this a "reverse Guido"

This past week I also had some time to reflect on some more of your funny little quirks lately, such as...

~ Requesting peanut butter toast by asking for "square-shaped bread with peanut butter".
~ And while you like to eat peanut butter toast, you tell me that you are nervous to bring peanut butter to school because of other kids' allergies (aww...such a considerate soul).
~ Refusing to call pink, pink...but preferring to say it is "light, light red".
~ You love to play "spy kids" at school recess and are currently having trouble deciding between being a vampire and a spy for Halloween.
~ And finally, asking if we could throw you a "surprise booster seat party" when you finally make weight to move up and out of your car seat and into a booster seat.

Here are a few more of your quirks, as shared with our friends and family on Facebook:

~ on the way home from school, M informed me that she will be "prance-forming" in her school's Christmas show on December 16th and wants her family there. Mark your calendars...can't wait...I've never seen a "prance-formance" before!

and

~ just signed M up for her first hip hop class...while checking out the studio last night, this happened:
M: "Will I get to do a back flip?"
Me: "Hmmm...probably not in the first class."

I love, love, love all of these funny little quirks about you, and so so so much more.

You also enjoyed helping Daddy stain part of the upper deck.

like father...

like daughter

We played on the playground for a bit on Friday when I came to get you, however between the oppressive heat and our need to celebrate the start of a long weekend, we cut out early for milkshakes on the way home. As we got in the car, you told me about how you got some reward tickets in your classroom that day. Basically, students can earn special tickets at any time for doing good deeds, being a good listener, obeying rules, being kind, etc...and then they can trade them in for prizes and privileges throughout the year. You went on to share that you had earned one of these tickets for choosing not to do anything when a little boy in your class kept pushing and pushing you. Of course, my mama bear radar went up when I heard this. Who the heck is pushing my kid around? But, as I asked you more questions, I realized that this is the little boy in your class who happens to have Down Syndrome. As you explained further to me, looking right into my eyes and saying, "He just doesn't know any better, Mom." Evidently, the teacher has made it clear to you and the rest of the kids in your class that this little boy, just like every other first grader, is still learning to make good choices and control his impulses better. As your story sunk in and I realized that you had made a decision with the maturity of someone much older than just your 6 years, my heart was touched. Miss Stenger must have been proud of you too, having noticed and rewarded your maturity with that ticket. As we drove home, I made sure to tell you how proud I was that you chose to be kind to this boy and tried to understand things from his perspective instead of retaliating when he pushed you. It made my heart both swell and breathe a sigh of relief at the same time. You have such an old, kind and wise soul in you.

That night, Daddy took you over to Uncle Joe's for a dudes' night of cards, while I went to a movie with Lao Lao and Aunt Tina.

evidently you kicked butt in War ~ our little card shark!

Saturday morning, in spite of all of the preparations that are needed for the upcoming week, our little family unit decided to take a break from it all and spend some quality time together. I was feeling terribly disconnected from you and Daddy and I was missing just the three of us hanging out all together something fierce. I decided to surprise both of you, whisking you off on an adventure but not telling you where we were going. I love surprises like that (even though I am usually horrible at keeping the surprise a secret most of the time)!

no idea where you were headed, but you're
prepared with your spy goggles

You were both good sports about the surprise and we all ended up having a great time together at the Olentangy Indian Caverns. None of us had been there before so it was a brand new experience. As we explored and meandered together, I realized how important it is to yell "Stop!" now and then, deliberately stepping back from all the craziness that is everyday life, and carve out special family time like this. It's been way too long for us and it felt so good to just be with the two of you again.

using your spy goggles to look at the map

cavern family selfie

with the cavern all around you, I think you
look part human, part alien here

you took this photo for Daddy and me because
I loved how that archway looked behind us

gem mining was a big hit

Sunday was a rainy day spent inside getting chores done. That afternoon I headed to Allie's bridal shower but luckily Daddy and Lao Lao were there to play with you and help you with homework.
I left to the sounds of you wrestling with Daddy and laughing up a storm, came home to you and Daddy sitting at the table and finishing up your homework for school, and then later found a note that was dictated by you to Lao Lao as she helped you with an "investigation of Daddy's crime spree" while I was gone. Ha. So thankful for these two grown ups who are forever young at heart.

Daddy, the jungle gym

Suzy's turn

Mali's turn

where'd the ball go, girls?

part of the note reads, "subject instigated a fight.
changed his mind about fighting" ~ you two are
a regular Sherlock and Holmes team. Ha!

That night, you, Lao Lao and I sat together and went through your photo album of our adoption trip to China. We talked about all the pictures once again and as we got to a photo of us in front of a Buddhist temple with incense burning, the conversation landed on ancestors. You asked if you had ancestors. As I began to explain that you do have ancestors and that they are related to your birth parents, you clammed up. I could tell that it had struck a chord with you but that you simply were not ready to talk or ask about it yet. And that's ok. I tried to tell you that if you ever need to talk or ask about your China family, that Daddy and I are always here to listen, talk, or do anything else you need us to do. Honestly, I wasn't sure exactly what to say in that moment. I just knew that I wanted to reassure you, somehow... but I have no idea if it got through. You stayed so quiet and squirmed the slightest bit on my lap. I knew you weren't comfortable yet. I can't really tell much about how you are taking it all in yet. But I know that you are definitely thinking something. I don't know what this journey will look like for you. But I know that it's not going to be simple. And again, that is ok. No matter what you are wondering, worried about, confused about, feel indifferent or angry about, feel curious about, just need to vent about, or any of the million other emotions or needs you may have that are completely normal in a situation like this but that perhaps I failed to mention; I want you to know that none of it is too big for either your daddy or me to handle. I know that there are certain parts of this journey of self-discovery that you will need to do alone and/or without your Daddy and me. But I also hope that when the time comes, you can feel comfortable enough to tell us anything and be confident that we are here to help out of love for you, and your China family. Honestly, we likely have many of the same questions that you are already asking, if not out loud, then in your heart. I hope you can let us be there if / when you need us. I hope. I just hope. I hope with all of my heart.

talking about our trip to China through pictures

The one thing I definitely thought was very interesting is that shortly after we hit this lull in our conversation about your ancestors and your China family, you asked, "Mom, what is God?" Hmm. Now that's an excellent question. Both Lao Lao and I took a moment, then shared each of our personal understandings of God with you, and talked about how there are as many personal ideas and understandings of God as there are people in the world. We also encouraged you to ask other family members, people like Memaw and Papaw for example, what they think God is as well. We talked about how there are many different religions all throughout the world and that they each have their own ideas about what God is too. Then we asked you what you thought about God. You took a moment and then asked if you could draw a quick picture before bed. This is what you came up with...

Mr. and Mrs. God, in their golden cave, with their crowns
and thrones (because he is the king of the world), and God
 is looking to the side because he's "busy making people"

I love that you are getting older and capable of having more in depth conversations now. It's fascinating to me to listen to your interpretation of the world and your understanding of our place in it. My budding young philosopher.

Finally, Monday was our bonus weekend day, Labor Day. I personally enjoyed some peace and quiet in the early morning at the garden center where I filled up on hot coffee and the beauty of some gorgeous flowers to begin my day, bringing home more mums for us to plant and some clay pots for you to paint in cheerful colors.

instead of "black eyed susans", you call these
beauties "black guy susans" = awesome

it didn't even matter that it began to sprinkle a bit,
nothing was going to stop your creativity

The rest of the day we worked at home, ordered dinner in, and rounded out the evening on a walk with Suzy and Abby. Another weekend in the books. Bring on the short week. We're ready for it.

Love,
Mama