Ok.
So, we hit a rough patch with you recently, dealing with the inevitable ugliness that creeps into many (if not all) childhoods at some point and in one form or another. Basically, you called Daddy and me from school, very upset with some of the comments at least two of the children were making and also with how mean some of them can act. After getting off the phone with you, I turned to our little village through Facebook to see what kind of advice everyone had to deal with these types of situations. I am very happy to report that what they all had to say was heartwarming, encouraging, strengthening, reassuring, and insightful. With every message received, I felt so lucky to have so many helpful people literally at my fingertips. There were so many good ideas, that I wanted to include the entire conversation here so that we could hang onto it as a valuable resource, should we need their wisdom later. I am editing out last names, for privacy of our dear friends and family...but the entire conversation is included below (with the exception of some of the more private conversations that were emailed to me separately).
Here you go, Tootsie. Enjoy! You are loved!
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~ Parenting Question:
Mali has been complaining of "stomach aches" lately and we have reason to believe they're more emotional than physical in nature. Evidently she's been getting called a boy and teased sometimes because of her hair being short and the clothes she wears (she hates dresses and anything frilly or "feminine"). She currently loves both her style in clothes and her short hair and is adamant about keeping both (as she should be, I'm glad she chooses to be an individual) but it's a hard lesson to learn that there are some nasty people in the world who choose to judge and be mean just because you don't conform to their expectations. Does anyone have any suggestions on building her up and empowering her to better deal with this type of situation? I'd appreciate any and all feedback. TIA!
So, we hit a rough patch with you recently, dealing with the inevitable ugliness that creeps into many (if not all) childhoods at some point and in one form or another. Basically, you called Daddy and me from school, very upset with some of the comments at least two of the children were making and also with how mean some of them can act. After getting off the phone with you, I turned to our little village through Facebook to see what kind of advice everyone had to deal with these types of situations. I am very happy to report that what they all had to say was heartwarming, encouraging, strengthening, reassuring, and insightful. With every message received, I felt so lucky to have so many helpful people literally at my fingertips. There were so many good ideas, that I wanted to include the entire conversation here so that we could hang onto it as a valuable resource, should we need their wisdom later. I am editing out last names, for privacy of our dear friends and family...but the entire conversation is included below (with the exception of some of the more private conversations that were emailed to me separately).
Here you go, Tootsie. Enjoy! You are loved!
------------------------------------------------
~ Parenting Question:
Mali has been complaining of "stomach aches" lately and we have reason to believe they're more emotional than physical in nature. Evidently she's been getting called a boy and teased sometimes because of her hair being short and the clothes she wears (she hates dresses and anything frilly or "feminine"). She currently loves both her style in clothes and her short hair and is adamant about keeping both (as she should be, I'm glad she chooses to be an individual) but it's a hard lesson to learn that there are some nasty people in the world who choose to judge and be mean just because you don't conform to their expectations. Does anyone have any suggestions on building her up and empowering her to better deal with this type of situation? I'd appreciate any and all feedback. TIA!
Erica
Theresa - how about putting her on some athletic teams - i am unsure of her age but there are a lot of girls in that arena who are less identified by what they are wearing or anything external - its more of a team motto - common goal - we are all one. My next recommendation is to send her to a private school and wear uniforms. I try desparately to teach my daughters that all that matters is what's inside - not outside - clothes shoes - hair - it means nothing - its difficult - and kids can be mean.
Julie Is it kids being mean or genuinely curious? I know both my girls are curious and truly don 't know if it's a boy or girl. Them asking isn't meant to be rude or mean. If it is adults who know better then I say "screw them!" Tell her to be herself and know that there may be questions from other kids who don't know her. It's a shame but you may want to tell her that some grown ups don't act grown up but she shouldn't listen to them! Good luck!
Heather She reminds me so much of Amanda my little sister I agree with her trying sports again. I think the constant communication and focusing on her individuality and things she is good at. I have a plus size teen that has so much confidence because we had constant discussions about what makes her special and how some people are mean because they are hurting or have their own issues. I hope this helps it's so hard when they hurt.
My girls didn't like it until they were 6 either - good luck - my other trick is to dress like them - this will pass : )
Theresa
Julie ~ it's both. Curiosity she can handle as we've all dealt with this when she first came home and her cleft was still unrepaired and we'd get a lot of stares and questions, but there are a few jerks at daycare that are just mean to a lot of kids and Mali's choices give them easy ammo. Grown ups will sometimes mistake her for a boy but it's usually not a big deal.
Julie ~ it's both. Curiosity she can handle as we've all dealt with this when she first came home and her cleft was still unrepaired and we'd get a lot of stares and questions, but there are a few jerks at daycare that are just mean to a lot of kids and Mali's choices give them easy ammo. Grown ups will sometimes mistake her for a boy but it's usually not a big deal.
Theresa
Heather ~ we do a lot of talking and boost her up any chance we get. So far she seems to have a lot of confidence but lately she's had a few moments at school where it's gotten to be too much. Her teacher told me this morning that she's been more and more emotional lately when kids get mean. It makes me so mad and breaks my heart. How did your daughter handle those instances where kids are just, pardon my language, assholes?
Heather ~ we do a lot of talking and boost her up any chance we get. So far she seems to have a lot of confidence but lately she's had a few moments at school where it's gotten to be too much. Her teacher told me this morning that she's been more and more emotional lately when kids get mean. It makes me so mad and breaks my heart. How did your daughter handle those instances where kids are just, pardon my language, assholes?
Julie Ugh, hate dealing with the usual little jerks! Are they constantly bothering her? Or the occasional remark? If it's on going I think something needs to be said to the daycare staff. I would just re assure her and like a previous post, tell her that some kids are mean because they are sad or angry with something in their life. It has nothing to do with her personally, they just act out and they have chosen her to aim there anger at. Good luck
Kristy Summer = less sleep therefore more emotional. Try an earlier bedtime. With mine that alone helped ..
Theresa
Julie ~ it seems occasional for now (hopefully will get less) and the teachers have reassured me that it doesn't seem to be targeted towards only M. I have talked to her teachers but am willing to go in with both guns blazing if need be as well. I hope I don't have to do that. It's not pretty when Mama Bear has to come out.
Julie ~ it seems occasional for now (hopefully will get less) and the teachers have reassured me that it doesn't seem to be targeted towards only M. I have talked to her teachers but am willing to go in with both guns blazing if need be as well. I hope I don't have to do that. It's not pretty when Mama Bear has to come out.
Theresa I love you, Christina! And I will make sure that you get the call from the school when she quotes your last suggestion ;)
Mali reminds me so much of a girl I know who isn't the least bit feminine. She won't even wear a girl's bathing suit. Is Mali inclined to the theatre or arts in any way? We artsy types are notorious for embracing people for who they are. The little girl I know is in middle school now and gets along just fine. She has her core group of friends and does her thing. Her wardrobe still revolves around her football jersey.
Julie Amen to that! We used to have some of the same issues with Emily. She has always loved Spiderman and even dressed as him for a few halloweens. Kids just didn't understand but weren't ever cruel. My girls are still putting up with nasty little a-holes in our neighborhood. Can not stand how cruel some kids are!
Melissa First, I get wanting to get all momma bear and protect your precious daughter. An initial question falls in the curious camp. Persistent questions are to get a rise. Not giving that reaction is so hard. It was for me as a kid and it's hard for my Lily. I've worked with Lily that the whole "whatever" type attitude and response will typically make the kids stop. We practice the "I know you x, You know you are x and those say who otherwise can go jump in a lake" philosophy. I think now at 10 Lily has witnessed that looking and acting ambivalent tends to diffuse the situation.
Amy I like a lot of these suggestions. Bottom line is people can suck and kids are mean. Hell I had short hair for the longest time as an adult and constantly got pointed out or questioned, and I myself am far from girly....people are lame and it takes more strength and coolness to stand up and be yourself than it does to follow the herd.
Chantel That SUCKS! Kids are turds! To be honest I'm a chicken shit about my kids getting teased 'cause like Mali they like wearing hello kitty and nail polish so I homeschool! Not saying you should just saying you're a great mom and I hope kids knock it off!
Theresa
Erin ~ she just might be interested in that stuff eventually. There's not a lot of choices that I'm aware of at her age yet. She loves music (e.g. anything similar to Beastie Boys, etc for dancing and most top 40 stuff she'll belt out right along with the radio) and break dancing. She doesn't like any other type of dance classes because of the costumes and most times they've bored her. I think she is headed towards somewhere that she can express herself and be accepted for her individuality but not necessarily want any spotlight as she gets embarrassed easily.
Erin ~ she just might be interested in that stuff eventually. There's not a lot of choices that I'm aware of at her age yet. She loves music (e.g. anything similar to Beastie Boys, etc for dancing and most top 40 stuff she'll belt out right along with the radio) and break dancing. She doesn't like any other type of dance classes because of the costumes and most times they've bored her. I think she is headed towards somewhere that she can express herself and be accepted for her individuality but not necessarily want any spotlight as she gets embarrassed easily.
Melissa I think your doing all the right things. It is so hard to see them hurting and the best thing you can do is teach them the skills to handle comments and build their confidence. I talk with my kids about responses you could say that will stop the comments and leave you alone. If they don't have a response, then walk away. I don't mean a response that is hurtful back, just a generic response that let's them know it doesn't bother you what they say(even if it does). My daughter complained of stomach aches this year and I had to pick her up from school one day. We talked and figured out it was something at school bothering her. Keep her talking, too. All of you coming up with a solution is better than none. I agree talking to the daycare is good, having them on board is always good. They don't always see everything, so an extra eye is always good. Kids know when to make comments and it it is usually when adults aren't around especially as they get older and wiser.
Erin
I know of two friends who have their young daughters in break dancing class. I will get the info and pass it on. Of course she has her own superstar breaking dancing resource in her very own home.
Kelly We have dealt with this for years with Eloise, when people say things like that we just simply remind her they are not always trying to be mean but are curious. We have always let her dress and cut her hair the way she likes and tell her she can't cry every time someone asks her if she is a boy or girl. I love their spunk and individuality but it is hard to let them find their own place in this crazy world. Just keep loving her and giving her self confidence and all will work out. Eloise is 10 now and in the last 6 months has started to be a little more girly but what ever makes her happy we support!
Theresa
Amy and Chantel ~ I am so proud of her for being an individual and yes, some kids are just sucky little turds! I definitely want to encourage her to be herself...it's just a much more difficult path to choose sometimes. *sigh*
Amy and Chantel ~ I am so proud of her for being an individual and yes, some kids are just sucky little turds! I definitely want to encourage her to be herself...it's just a much more difficult path to choose sometimes. *sigh*
Heather My daughter said she learned to ignore at a young age. She stayed away from anyone that said anything to her. Somehow I survived this and my girls not being as sensitive as me. You are an amazing mom follow your heart and you are doing all the right things.
Chantel Oh gosh so hard for a mama to watch our kids be individuals!!!!!
Kelly This has been going on for so long.....You may want to mention that to Mali and maybe tell her a story of your own(I think we all have experienced mean people). Maybe talk to her about patience and understanding for the kids that don't get the proper direction from their family.....good luck!
Scott Our son was constantly called a little girl, and egged on by one specific kid his kindergarten year, just because he had longer hair than the other boys. We were called in for a mini conference with his teacher informing us of all this teasing. We had no idea until his teacher let us know, she had already talked to the boys parents, and they said they would work with their son. We talked to Christian about it, he is now going into 6th grade and good friends with the boy. He told us he would ignore him and sometimes come back with shut up, Michelle, the boys name is Michael. Christian got in trouble from the teacher for that one, but it was his only defense at the time that would annoy this other kid. Kids are just cruel. They will find anything to pick on another kid for, but most times it is because they have low self esteem and pick on kids for the attention from others. You could explain it that way to Mali. Hope things get better for her soon.
Sadly..girls are just mean. Having a boy & a girl the same age I have really noticed. Like I tell my daughter...be who you are and if others can't accept that, well they just aren't worth the time it takes to worry about it! It is so hard to see your baby hurt! Keep encouraging her to be her own person! I happen to think she is awesome!
Scott We also had a horrible neighbor, an adult who bullied our kids. Talk about worst case scenario. My wife got so upset last May after going through 4 years of it on and off, just because the kids stepped foot into his yard. Last May my wife went out at 7:30 in the morning and had it out with him and followed the whole conversation up with "If you don't like my kids, then MOVE! LOL, done, he moved out less than a year later.
Michelle So sorry, Theresa and Mali! Kids are aweful sometimes. It's hard not wanting to throat punch them. So good job for not doing so. If you do end up throat punching them, I'll bail your ass out of jail.
I know COFCC offers an empowering workshop in the fall ("the power of me" I think) that would be helpful. Also having Mali find a passion to pour herself into where she can work out her emotions. Possibly a counselor, I'm a huge advocate and Children's has some azimg peeps to help build children up. Lastly, keep up being a rock star Mom!
I know COFCC offers an empowering workshop in the fall ("the power of me" I think) that would be helpful. Also having Mali find a passion to pour herself into where she can work out her emotions. Possibly a counselor, I'm a huge advocate and Children's has some azimg peeps to help build children up. Lastly, keep up being a rock star Mom!
AnnMarie You seem to be getting great advise! I was going to say pretty much the same thing , the more of a rise they get the worse it will get . Hard for them to understand mean kids because they are not like that! I had trouble a few times between the crew here & yes my Momma bear was ready to jump but I pulled back . Diffent makes them special & I always tell them the world would be so boring if we're all the same! My son had some issues really mean kid, he is very into art & music he did find his outlet & some really great friends. It will work its way out but sometimes it takes a lil time. It hard on them & you. In the end they are a lil stronger & more determine to be themselves. I was bullie when I was a kid ( it's never easy)but it made me a lil stronger & more empathic . Your both great parents just keep doing what your doing , encourage her , help understand it's not her issue & she know she is loved by her family no matter what! I know with you guys in her corner she will make through! Hang in there Momma!
Theresa Thank you, AnnMarie! I tell Mali the same thing about the world being boring if we were all the same too! I appreciate your advice and support!
Theresa
Michelle ~ now why didn't I think of a good solid throat punch?! LOL Your comment made me actually laugh out loud. I will hold you to that bail thing too, girlie! :) I actually already called my own therapist this morning for some direction or a referral for M...I'm a huge believer in reaching out and getting the help sooner than later, if we can. And between yours and Christina's comment, us Fu Mommies are a bunch you don't want to mess with!
Michelle ~ now why didn't I think of a good solid throat punch?! LOL Your comment made me actually laugh out loud. I will hold you to that bail thing too, girlie! :) I actually already called my own therapist this morning for some direction or a referral for M...I'm a huge believer in reaching out and getting the help sooner than later, if we can. And between yours and Christina's comment, us Fu Mommies are a bunch you don't want to mess with!
AnnMarie You know it think you are both amazing parents and Mali is an incredible lil girl !
Stacy I'm sorry. That makes me so angry. I think you all are doing a phenomenal job as parents. Be her safe place to come home to, to cry to, to be angry and frustrated sometimes. And keep supporting her. If that didn't help I'll drive to Ohio and show those kids my mad karate skillz! Take the punks dooowwwnnn! ;-) give Mali a big hug from us.
Theresa I love your spunk, Stacy!!
Dodie After school activities like gymnastics, or whatever she is interested in will build confidence and keep her too busy to worry about it.
Mindy Get Jamie Lee Curtis's book I'm gonna like me. It's really good and it'll help her understand that it's great being Mali.
Theresa Thanks Mindy...just put in a request at the library!
Mary Heartbreaking. It is hard to sit back and watch. It is better to learn at a young age than to learn when she is older and more away from her parents. Kids are mean. And some parents are mean. Lots of books out there to read. Tell her she is to not impress anyone but herself and who accepts her are true friends. As for the belly aches, find something that comforts her...comfort food...let her run the show on what she eats for awhile. Get books about identity and how it makes us all unique. The Jamie Lee Curtis is one, Andrew Soloman for adults is a great one,
Mary Our identity is who we are and we should be proud of it. I love all Mali pictures that I see on Shawn wall. You are doing the right thing. Great parents. I wish I would've let my true identity out at such a young age. Good for her!!!
Mary I can send my boys over to rough them up if you'd like :-)
Theresa Thank you, Mary! I wish I would have had Mali's courage at a younger age myself, too!
Jill We ended up taking our daughter out of traditional school and enrolling her in an online school. I know this just isn't an option for a lot of parents, but it was one of the best choices we've ever made for her. She is involved in youth group and she attends are classes at CCAD where she regularly comes in contact with a lot of like minded people.
Amy T when Addi was in 2nd grade she was under a lot of stress and put on weight. There were 3 boys who would make fun of her daily calling her "fatty Addi". She came home daily crying, I would go to the bus driver and the school and they just wouldn't do anything about it. After the 3rd time another kid told her to stand up for herself and let him have it. So he started again on their way home and she stood up and punched him square in the face. It was so funny to be honest. She is such a kind spirit and loving, but she did it for the first and only time. I was proud of her, not because I want her to put her hands on anyone but she managed to find it in herself to stand up. Now of course then the school wanted her off the bus for 2 days, but I forced their hand and made them take the boys off as well. So I did make her do restitution to the driver, by sweeping her bus at the end of the day one of those 2 days but she knew it had nothing to do with the boy.
All that to say, after that we would talk at dinners or play times about what makes her special and why she thought she was special and she is now a teen, struggles with weight but it does not define her and who she see's herself, she see's that as her battle not her definition.
All that to say, after that we would talk at dinners or play times about what makes her special and why she thought she was special and she is now a teen, struggles with weight but it does not define her and who she see's herself, she see's that as her battle not her definition.
Kimberly I was going to suggest checking out books about bullying/self-esteem, but it looks like you already had the same idea! This kind of stuff always makes me angry. I have four kids who all march to the beat of the their own drum in one way or another. I always quote Dr. Seuss to them: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
Although it's tough now, I think that Mali is going to be one of the most awesome adults ever. She's already a damn cool kid! I love hearing your stories about her and she just seems like she has the best attitude. Hopefully she never loses her individuality.
Although it's tough now, I think that Mali is going to be one of the most awesome adults ever. She's already a damn cool kid! I love hearing your stories about her and she just seems like she has the best attitude. Hopefully she never loses her individuality.
Amy I also wanted to say that bulling is out there because as parents we don't correct our children and those carrying for our kids can't due to all the restrictions on them. For Mali, not only help her build up her own self esteem but teach her to keep that kind hearted personality you say she has, that kindness will hurt a lot through the years but it also will make her into a light as she grows up.
Erin Talked to my friends. Their daughters took hip-hop and break dancing at Generations in Westerville and Artisan Dance Studio in Clintonville. No dresses permitted!
Jo Send her to Colorado to hang out with her Aunt YoYo who NEVER wore dresses and who had short hair for most of her life who has more doc martens in her shoe box than any other shoes - tell Mali that mean people plant little seeds that are bad seeds - tell her the only way for her to battle kids making fun of her is to Not give those nasty little seeds any water - and then those stomach aches will stay away
She is who she is. Tell her to tell herself she is awesome and that if anyone is making fun of her it's because they want to be just like her!!
If that doesn't work then I'm gonna teach her to kick some ass ...
She is who she is. Tell her to tell herself she is awesome and that if anyone is making fun of her it's because they want to be just like her!!
If that doesn't work then I'm gonna teach her to kick some ass ...
Kristy Mean kids suck..... have her wear a long blond girly wig to school for fun.. have her ham it up.. then take it off...it will look so ridiculous they will realize that look is so not her!
Chantel Right?! My boys are my heros!!!!! I wish I had their courage and strength of character before I turned 30!!!!!
Theresa
Amy ~ wow. That sounds so tough but I'm glad Addi has done well in overcoming that tough lesson that we all go through at one point or another in our lives. And you and Kimberly are right...the junk she's going through now really stinks but hopefully it will strengthen her in the long run. I'd much rather have her become a creative, strong, empathetic and kind individual than just one of the herd who can't relate enough to others' pain and perpetuates their own pain on others. Thank you both for sharing with me...it really helps :)
Amy ~ wow. That sounds so tough but I'm glad Addi has done well in overcoming that tough lesson that we all go through at one point or another in our lives. And you and Kimberly are right...the junk she's going through now really stinks but hopefully it will strengthen her in the long run. I'd much rather have her become a creative, strong, empathetic and kind individual than just one of the herd who can't relate enough to others' pain and perpetuates their own pain on others. Thank you both for sharing with me...it really helps :)
Donna I have short hair, hate dresses, dig shorts and tanks. Little boobs (which are proportionate with my chicken legs) Jewelry, simple like me. What you see is what you get and those who call me sir and apologize, no apology needed, this is the way I chose to be comfortable and love life puts them in place. I'm so glad Mali has the best parents ever!
Kellie Mean kids do stink. Alaina had problems on the bus two years ago. It was a little girl who sat behind her and teased her about everything she wore and the way she looked. I finally handed Alaina a little travel pack of Kleenex and told her the next time a little girl made fiber to stand up and hander the Kleenex and tell her here's some tissues for all of your issues. She did that the next day and she did it loud enough that everybody could hear and see her and the girl never made fun of her again. Keep in mind it went on for months before I thought of this idea. It takes a while for them to build up that self-confidence to stand up for what they feel and believe. With Cara, she is enrolled in tae kwon do. That seems to be giving her a lot of self-confidence.
Victoria Ph Feeling helpless is exactly how I feel too when Hayden comes home and is sad about someone being mean to him. Unfortunately they are at that age where it becomes painfully clear that kid cruelty is still alive and well. You got a lot of great ideas which I plan to utilize too, but I just wanted to say that you are a great mom to encourage her to be herself and to be kind to others. She will get through this and it will be a season that passes just like all the other not so fun parenting phases. You are doing great momma and all you can do is be her rock and guide through one of life's shitty realities.
Theresa I love it Donna...no one should ever apologize for being who they are!!
Theresa
Victoria Ph ~ Thank you so much! It's so hard to watch but I know she just needs to get through this and find her way (with our help, of course)...I know she will come out stronger and wiser for it. We all went through this and look how fantabulous we all turned out :) Right?!? LOL
Victoria Ph ~ Thank you so much! It's so hard to watch but I know she just needs to get through this and find her way (with our help, of course)...I know she will come out stronger and wiser for it. We all went through this and look how fantabulous we all turned out :) Right?!? LOL
Suzanne I talked to delaney about Mali being sad and her short hair and choice of clothes. Delaney said "she likes clothes me!" And the other kids weren't being very nice. She said she would rather try to make her laugh. She looked mali's picture and said she looked like she was a lot of fun and really nice :). She needed some objective kids giving their opinion too.
Victoria Ph Exactly!! ;)
Tricia Nobody is better than you. Kids are mean :(. Maybe talk to the principle and ask how they would handle it.
Jennifer I have not a single clue but Jo hit the nail on the head. My baby loves Spider-Man and anything comic or transformer. Mali reminds me of Sofia, even though we shoved Sofia in a dress for the party you came too. Once school starts again we will yet again have the very same Stomach ache and headache problems as you are now. Kids are so mean, but yet I have to step back and look at the mean kids parents because 97% of the time, I can meet them once and right away see where the problems started. This world is such a mean and hateful place and we need more Mali's to plant some more good seeds!!! Please give her a super hug from me and my Spider-Man Sofia and tell her to keep being her happy go lucky self cause that is who so many people know and love!
Theresa Thank you, Jennifer! And I agree about Jo ~ in fact I just read Mali what Jo had said and she got the biggest kick out of it, giggled at the fact she said "kick some ass", then rolled into me and said, "I really want to see Jo from Colorado" :)
Shelby :( It's sad that kids can be mean, but that's why it is so important that they are taught manners and have good parents. Tell Mali no worries! I never played with dolls or played house. My mom said she would put me in a dress and do my hair, and I'd come home with my hair all messed up cause kids liked to play with it and my dress all dirty from playing with the boys. I hated wearing dresses and skirts until college. Not everybody follows the norm or is all girly. Rock on!
Beth Kids can be so cruel, but then again, we see it all the time with adults too, so it is no wonder where it is coming from. MZW has heard a few not so nice comments thrown his way and he is just so sad about it- he has a very hard time letting them go too. When he and I talk about it I apporach it from the other kid's point of view- what do we think the other kid is thinking, why do we think the other kid is acting this way, what is the other kid missing out on at home that makes him act up with others... I want Matthew to walk away and ignore, but I also want him to both show compassion to others who may be hurting and to appreciate what he has. :) that being said, how cool is it that Christina said "...my children..." :)
Patricia My mom died when I was six. I lived with my grandma for 2 years. She had all my hair cut very short b/c it was easier for her. I wore my cousins hand me downs (his name was David) boots and coats too. Kids made fun of me at recess because my mom died. (Teasing: Patti has no mommy) After recess one of the boys at my table said, don't cry Patti I'm gonna beat all those kids up after school. I smiled. His name was Mike Scott! One good friend makes all the difference!
Theresa Love the compassion tips, Beth. There are a few kids at school who are having some serious behavior issues and at least two of them I know of are going through very rough situations at home. Mali is aware of some of the kids dealing with divorce already. Last night, we talked a little about wondering what might be happening outside of school that might make one kid in particular act soon mean. It does help to turn the focus on that aspect. Several of the story books I picked up touched on that too and she liked the stories. I'll be sure to use some of your questions with her in the future!
Patricia There have always been bullies. Friends can really make the difference. Actually being a tomboy was much more fun than one of the dainty delicate types. You get to play soccer and football instead of doing dishes!
Theresa Mali easily makes friends and has a few of the kids light up when she arrives at daycare in the morning. I'm very thankful for that! I think she'll be ok...it just gets hard to watch some of the crap that goes on. But you're definitely right, much more fun to be the silly tomboy in my opinion too!
Julie Be true to yourself.... that's what makes you YOU:-) i will keep you all in my prayers!!!!
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