And so this is Christmas...and what have we done? ...A LOT!.

Maliana ~

Monday was very difficult for me. I got ready for work and kissed you for a long time as you slept, before heading out the door for the day. The hours seemed to take longer than usual and when I finally got to you at school, I broke down. Not only was this your first day back at school after the Sandy Hook incident on Friday, but you had forgotten it was "share day" until you got to school, and you had insisted on having your mittens (also forgotten in the rush of the morning). Daddy felt terrible, but thanks to two of your loving teachers (Ms. Brandi and Ms. Beth), you had a new pair of gloves and a new toy car (that you got to keep) for showing off at "share day". As hard as it was to be away from you that day, as Ms. Beth reassured me later as I cried in the middle of your school room, she reminded me of how much she adores you and that she would never let anything happen to you. As she recounted all of the "above and beyond" things that she and Brandi had done for you that day...I realized there really is no better place for you to be during the day, if I must be at work. This mama really needed to see and hear all of the good things that happened for you after such a tough morning, all because of the simple fact that your teachers care about you so much. We are so very fortunate.

Once home you insisted on creating "Christmas letters" as you called them, for the Wideman family. I love that you took it upon yourself and spent a good 40 minutes working on them. I let you "address" them yourself as well...and while I'm not so sure they will get to their destination as is, you reassured me they would. I love your confidence and creativity.

I love that you made sure to write "LOVE" on each of them

Tuesday meant it was your dental appointment. It is amazing what another 6 months can do for your level of cooperation. You sat in the chair (almost) by yourself, let them clean your teeth, and even got an X-ray. What a big girl! I also had to laugh because with you being a girl, they assumed you wanted to be "like a princess"...however, you corrected them by saying you'd rather be a "Superman bad guy". Ha. That'll teach 'em to gender stereotype their patients.

getting your teeth cleaned

After the dentist you wanted to go get chicken sandwiches so we wound up at DQ for some barbeque pulled chicken and ice cream. It was so simple but made you so happy to be out on a "date" with Mom. And I love our one on one time together too...without all of the distractions at home of chores around the house.

Drying you off from the tub that night...
Me: "You are getting so big...you can't get any bigger. I want you to be my little girl forever."
You: *grin*
Me: "No, I'm kidding. I love that you are getting bigger. Keep getting bigger and bigger, as long as you promise to always give me hugs, even when I'm a shriveled up old lady and you are bigger than me. Ok?"
You: "But Mom, when I get bigger, will you still be my mommy?"
Me: "Of course. Always. Nothing you can do will change that. I'll be your mommy forever and ever."
You: *satisfied grin*

Wednesday you had your drama graduation at school and thus put on a little show. Lao Lao had picked you up in the afternoon so I could go to a dentist appointment and when I saw you, you were wearing an early Christmas gift from her...green Converse sneakers. You love them. And on the way home from your "graduation", we all commented on what a good job you did at the program, listening and following instructions so well, and having a total blast. I love how comfortable you seem with it all.  If you wind up pursuing more of these drama classes...it's going to be so fun to watch!

Thursday I left work early and got some things in order that I've needed to do for a while, finally feeling more than ever prepared for Christmas and relaxed by the time I picked you up. I knew Daddy would be home late from work, so we hunkered down at home with some yummy food, flipped on the Christmas lights (both outside and all throughout the inside of our house), and snuggled together while watching the movie I rented for us, The Lorax. You loved it and even asked to watch it again when it was over...which I definitely don't mind since it's all about saving the Earth and choosing to love and take care of the environment rather than greedily wanting to make a buck at the expense of the planet. I'm not sure you understood all of the themes, but then again, I'm also surprised with how much you really do understand.

I had also picked up your Christmas photos from Target...I think they turned out pretty good!

Friday was so great...you had made brownies with me for your Christmas party at school and when  I picked you up you were in such a great mood. We got home and you informed me, "Mom, my friends loved them (the brownies)!" You were so proud. We immediately put on snowpants and got all bundled up and headed outside...while today was winter solstice (the Dongzhi festival in China), it was also our first snowfall of the season. It was awesome! If I was having any trouble getting into the Christmas spirit, this snow sure helped. We built snowmen, had a snowball fight with Roman (one of our great neighbors), then took Abby for a walk in the snowy dark of night, following her tracks in the snow and stopping to "sniff" every tree she did on the way home. We were running and laughing hysterically, with you stopping every so often to "snow angel bomb" random peoples' front yards or grab a handful of snow and pop it in your mouth exclaiming, "I love to eat snow!" We also saw a neighbor shoveling snow and you insisted on doing the same once we got home. The shovel was way too big for you and so you asked me to help you, with it being a very difficult and tedious task for both of us attempting to manhandle the shovel at one time. I was just about to give up and just tell you to let me do it when you said, "Mom, I love to help you"...which completely stopped me in my tracks and put me back in the moment with you. One of these days, you won't need my help to do these things, or you won't want it, and I'll desperately wish for moments like this. So I paused, and continued to struggle with you, the shovel, and the snow...and totally drank in the moment. We came in and warmed up with tomato soup and spicy dumplings (to celebrate Dongzhi)...with you proclaiming, "Mom, that was sooo fun!!" What a super way to kick off the winter season!

rolling snow for your snowman

first snowmen of the season!

shaking the snow from her ears

our Abby

snowball fight with Roman

taking cover in your fort

what a fun neighbor!

putting a little muscle into it!

Saturday we headed to northern Ohio to Punderson State Park to stay overnight in a cabin and go for a sleigh ride at Ma and Pa's Cabin for our Garrabrant Christmas gathering. We missed Papaw Rick and Uncle Flint who both had to work, but we definitely had a LOT of fun! You were a bit concerned by how large the horses were and how dark it was on the sleigh ride, our trail lit only by lanterns fastened to trees through the woods, but after a while you got used to the experience. Evidently, our driver told us we were the first group he'd ever heard sing "Jingle Bells" as they rode along in the two horse open sleigh, which we thought was crazy. How could you NOT sing "dashing through the snow..." while in an open sleigh before Christmas? As we walked to the car after the sleigh ride, you exclaimed into the night, "That was AWESOME!"

Ma and Pa's Cabin was so cute!

stores with real sleeping dogs are always cool

so much neat stuff crammed into such a tiny shop

on the sleigh and ready to go!

sleigh ride at night...so much fun!

 

you can tell you're not so sure about this...
but you did great (eventually)!

 

Daddy and Uncle Forge...dashing through the snow

giddy up, giddy up, giddy up, let's go!...
we're riding in a wonderland of snow!

the blur is actually the steam coming off the horses...
and you can see our path was lit by lanterns on trees!

When we got back to the cabin, we laid out all of our munchies, decorated the cabin with Christmas lights and a tiny tree, and you opened your gifts. I love how you open them slowly and show your apreciation for each one. We watched Arthur Christmas, with you and Lao Lao the only ones who could stay awake until after midnight!

Lao Lao loved her Secret Santa gift from you

hugs for Uncle Forge

the Angry Birds game was probably the biggest hit of the night

The next morning you were a bit freaked out that our elf, Santa Claus Jr., had followed you all the way to Punderson, but got back to being your silly self after a few minutes. Thanks to Lao Lao, we also all had matching jammies and took the obligatory group photo before leaving. Even Abby has a pair of these jammies and will surely get her picture taken in them with us sooner or later. Ha. Poor dog.

totally invading Lao Lao's bunk...
wake up Lao Lao!!

matching jammies!

always must do the silly pose...always

never seen a kid more in love with snow than you!

On Sunday, we drove home and took a nice long family nap. It felt great. Once up, you dug up some fossils that had been a gift from Lao Lao, you and Daddy made the model of Ma and Pa's cabin that Lao Lao had also given us, and then you watched your very special video from Santa. Here's the link to your reaction...it is priceless!

you were so proud of putting this cabin together
with your Daddy

Christmas Eve I decided to ignore all of the thoughts racing through my head, commanding me to go out and get those last items because "I should...I should...I should"...and instead said "Screw it!" and stayed home with you and relaxed, did a little bit around the house....and just played with you. Thank goodness I did too because I might have missed watching you listen to my heartbeat as you tended to me as my doctor and say, "Let me listen to your heart beep." Too cute.

Finally it was time to get ready to meet Memaw and Papaw for Christmas Eve mass at St. Phillip's. During mass, you had lots of questions about Jesus, with one of my favorites for Memaw, "So, how do you know him?" You did a great job singing along, even if your missalette was upside down and on the wrong page.

with baby Jesus

 

 

after Christmas Eve mass

 

 

with Memaw and Papaw

After church we met Uncle Vince and Nadia at Billy Lee's for our annual Christmas Eve dinner with the Wilkinsons. You slept through nearly the entire meal on my lap (no nap earlier in the day), however it was full of lots of stories and laughter for the rest of us, as usual.

Memaw and Papaw had already left, but here we are
with Nadia and Uncle Vince

Once we got home, Audrey met us there and we all celebrated Christmas Eve together. She brought over a bunch of really thoughtful presents for you and I was relieved to hear you say thank you and really enjoy each and every one. You were also very excited to give each of us our Secret Santa gifts you'd picked out a few weeks ago at St. Phillip's. Audrey got a little plastic ski boot that reminded you of the boot she used to wear on her foot, then Daddy got a key holder, and I got an ID holder...or as you called it, an "idea holder". Too cute. I love it!

of course, right when we got home we had to change into our
matching jammies..even Abby had to!

thank you Audrey Ayi!!

you took this picture of Daddy and I with our
lovely Secret Santa gifts from you

We played a game of Candyland (thanks to Audrey for getting it for you), then made our magic reindeer food and set out milk and cookies for Santa. You were so tired, it was off to bed with you and after reading Brave Santa for one last time, you were asleep within a few short minutes.

magic reindeer food!

cookies and milk for Santa!

looks like Santa was here!

Christmas morning you slept until 8:15am and were chomping at the bit to go out to see if Santa had come...you were going nuts as I made you wait in the bedroom to make sure the camera had fresh batteries. Not to mention, I had to run down and figure out what to put in Abby's stocking since the first thing you said when you woke up wasn't about your gifts or stocking but rather, "I hope Abby got a new toy in her stocking!" (You are so sweet!) I scrambled and didn't have single new dog toy for Abby, but luckily we had a package of bacon for breakfast in the fridge and so I stuffed that in there with a nice note from "Santa" about what a good dog she's been and asking her to please share the bacon with her family. Worked like a charm...you were so excited to see Abby's bacon (bless your heart).

As for your gifts, you delicately opened each one and in between every other one would say, "Thank you Santa" (all on your own). There were many that you loved, and while I thought the big finale would be your favorite, you were actually very excited about the smaller gift that you'd been asking from Santa for the last month or so. A construction site...or rather, you got a bunch of construction vehicles. As you can see by your face below, you were thrilled! Even slept with them during your nap later.

Santa was here!

exactly what you asked for!

the finale

taking it out for a spin

but happy again with your favorite construction
toys during breakfast

After nap we got up and headed to Wai Gong's for their Christmas celebration. There were lots of people there and tons of activity, which you loved. You came up behind Ggma when we got there and said, "Hi Hi!" and gave her a hug, which tickled her to no end since you are usually so shy around her. All of you kids sat and opened presents and once again, I loved how you took your time and appreciated each one. Since I had not come with you the last time you went to Wai Gong's, you were excited to show me how you can now play air hockey. And of course you loved spending time with Uncle Blaize. It was truly good to see this family again since I have not really spent time with them in quite a while for various reasons. After many ups and downs this holiday season, like so many other people out there experience as well, I finally felt a bit more hopeful and at ease as we drove home from their house.

Hart Christmas 2012

children's gift opening madness

so excited about your "I'm a Gummibear"
video from cousin Becca

stocking

Memaw Lisa

Aunt Niecy

more hugs

me and my little bro

Guitar Hero! get it Mali!

showing off your mad air hockey skills

As I breathe a sigh of relief that we can log another successful Christmas in the books, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all that we have as a family...too many blessings to count. By no means is every single day easy, but all of the ups and downs of the last year have really taught me to recognize and appreciate when times are peaceful and good. I need to work on holding those memories and hopes close to my heart when we experience the heartbreaks and disappointments that are inevitable in life. With all that has happened to me personally in the last year, I do truly hope that the love and peace of Christmas can be sustained throughout all of next year and beyond. Wouldn't that be fabulous?

I think I just came up with my New Year resolution.

Love,
Mama